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  • #209 Self-improvement gap and a pressure trap

    Wanting to improve certain areas in your life is powerful.

    But that improvement gap comes with a pressure trap.

    Because if you believe you’re in control of your actions, the moments you accidentally fall back into old patterns become extra frustrating.

    When your self-worth becomes attached to your behavior, every action becomes a judgment of character.

    And so the pressure mounts.


    Missing one workout means you’re not worthy of running a marathon.

    Missing one day of writing means you’ll never be a writer.

    Making one communication mistake, making someone angry, means you’re a terrible person.

    To make that pressure bearable, build self-trust (for example, through Tiny Trust Builders).

    Trust that you can run a marathon, even if you miss a workout.

    Trust that you can be a writer, even if you miss one day of writing.

    Trust that you can be a good person, even if you’ve made mistakes or upset some people.

    Notice the improvement gap between where you are and where you want to go.

    Let the majority of your actions be a vote for the person you want to be.

    Focus on elastic discipline, not hardliner habits.

    Do all that, and you’ll feel more fulfilled and free.

  • #152 When we’re economically obsolete

    ChatGPT can write in 10 seconds what would take you hours.

    We’re entering an era where what makes us valuable is not economic output anymore.

    We can try to compete.

    Or we can rethink what still makes our lives valuable when we’re economically obsolete.

    I write for the sake of writing.

    I play chess for the sake of playing chess.

    I learn for the sake of learning.

    I sing for the sake of singing.

    I love my family for the sake of loving my

    I live for the sake of living.

    When we lose our economic value, value lies in life itself again.

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    #132 Unlimited Learning

    Learning often implies discovering what you can’t do.

    I can’t write and convey what I want to say. I can’t speak Spanish fluently. I can’t do this yoga pose.

    For many people that’s also the final destination, when in fact, it’s only the start.

    We’re missing a word: Learning is discovering what you can’t do yet.

    Or, even better:

    Learning is discovering what, through diligent practice, you’ll soon be able to do.

    After all, actions overrule thoughts.

    I can’t write and find the right words… yet. But with diligent practice, soon, I’ll be able to convey what I want to say.

    I’m not able to do this yoga pose… yet. But with diligent practice, soon I will.

    I can’t speak Spanish fluently… yet. But with diligent practice, soon I will.

    That’s all there is to it.

    Discover your current limit. Realize that through diligent practice, you’ll overcome it.

    Then you’ll find a new limit. And through diligent practice, you’ll overcome it.

    Until you find a new limit, which you’ll overcome… through diligent practice.

    Where do you let the discovery of your current limit be your end station?

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    #313 Keep it Achievable, Pleasurable, Sustainable

    I’ve been publishing daily posts for 300+ days now.

    The secret?

    Writing less.

    • I don’t want to spend hours writing daily posts, so I keep them short.

    • I don’t want to drag myself to a 4-day writing session to create all posts for the coming week in advance (then not write for the rest of the week)

    • I don’t want to set writing goals that are painful to reach and make me feel burnt out.

    • I do want to write a little bit every day, so I prove to myself every single day that I’m a writer.

    • I do want to feel that writing that daily post is achievable and fun.

    • I do want to build momentum.

    Keep it achievable. Keep it pleasurable. Keep it sustainable.

    In other words: Tiny Trust Builders.

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