#181 You’re never done

We cling the most, not to our prized possessions we worked hard to obtain, but to the painful patterns that both hurt us AND keep us comfortable.

Some questions to ask yourself today:

Who do I want to be?

Which actions will turn me into the person I want to be?

Which actions STOP me from turning into that person I want to be?

Which of my actions, habits, and tendencies am I frustrated about, but simultaneously perpetuating?

Which painful patterns am I scared to let go of because they have been instrumental in making me who I am today?

When you know you have crazy work days, build a simple base to come home to.

A serene home environment. A calming evening ritual. A nourishing hobby.

A sanctuary amidst the turmoil.

Because only when you can fully turn it off, can you fully turn it on without burning out.

Do you really want to write a book? Or do you actually want to dream about writing a book?

Do you really want to drop everything and move to a sea-side town? Or do you want to dream about dropping everything and move to a sea-side town?

Both are fine. Both can be fulfilling, because often, having a dream is enough.

But both are not the same.

Only you will know if it’s the dream that makes you happy, or the action you want to take.

Most people don’t really want the freedom to do anything they want, in other words, a life without constraints.

They want the freedom to set their own constraints.

To decide, “I want to spend my time writing,” instead of saying, “I am supposed to become a lawyer because that’s what we do in this family.”

To decide, “I don’t drink alcohol,” instead of saying, “My social circle forces me to have a glass when I’m out.”

To decide, “I want to live in that house, drive that car, and go on that exotic holiday, and I’m going to make it happen,” instead of saying, “I’m constrained by my talent, potential, current job, or where I grew up.”

To decide, “I have time to learn a new language because it’s important to me,” instead of saying, “I’m too busy, I can’t (or don’t deserve to) do anything nice for myself.”

Good or bad, beneficial or misguided, constraints are always there.

Because life constantly forces you to make decisions, and every decision leads to a new constraint.

Since it’s challenging to be aware of your decisions and their long-term constraining effects, which constraints do you consider important enough to set consciously (and spend considerable time and effort doing so)?

Where do you allow others to dictate the constraints you live within?

Who do you allow to dictate the constraints you live within?

Pick your freedom battles.