I can worry a thousand times until my worries come true.
I can envision my dreams a thousand times until my dreams come true.
Not because of the act of worrying or the dreaming itself.
But because my worries or dreams will incite different present actions taking me down different paths.
Whatever future I focus on a thousand times, I’ll be drawn towards.
Choose wisely.
We get hungry and look for food. Then we get hungry again.
We get thirsty and look for water. Then we’re thirsty again.
We want to create art and learn how to sing. Then we want to create more and learn how to draw.
Full satisfaction with our life as it is is an illusion. Desire will always be there, even if we think we’ve reached all our goals.
Without a gap between what we do and what we want to do, what we have and what we want, who we are and who we want to be, life becomes meaningless.
With that knowledge, how can we still be fulfilled?
The fulfillment formula may help:
Regardless of outcomes and results, are the majority of your daily actions in alignment with your purpose, values, and the identity you want to forge?
Even if you don’t write today, you’ll still be okay.
And knowing that, now you know you’re not forced to write, now the pressure gone, you might as well write something anyway.
You feel bad because you don’t write.
And when you write, you feel bad because you’re scared of the inevitable day you stop writing.
That’s how you create a self-improvement prison.
And that prison has only one way out.
Intend to do what’s good for you.
Then realize that even if you don’t live up to that standard all the time, you’re still worthy of self-love and self-trust.
Focus on intention, not outcome.
Focus on cultivating elastic discipline rather than on becoming a habit hardliner.
Focus on the general direction of your life, not a day-by-day judgment of your every action.
Maintain a majority vote for who you want to be.
Realize you’re not going to be perfect today – and being perfect isn’t the goal anyway.
Who are you trying to convince here?
Is it others, who hold their own perspectives and judgments?
Or is it yourself, wrestling with self-doubt and seeking reassurance?
The only approval you need is your own.
You don’t know what tomorrow will bring.
But you do have a say in how you spend today.
And when you go to bed, and tomorrow becomes today, you’ll have a say in that day too.
And when you spend every today doing what’s important, maybe you don’t even need to know what the future holds.
Most people don’t really want the freedom to do anything they want, in other words, a life without constraints.
They want the freedom to set their own constraints.
To decide, “I want to spend my time writing,” instead of saying, “I am supposed to become a lawyer because that’s what we do in this family.”
To decide, “I don’t drink alcohol,” instead of saying, “My social circle forces me to have a glass when I’m out.”
To decide, “I want to live in that house, drive that car, and go on that exotic holiday, and I’m going to make it happen,” instead of saying, “I’m constrained by my talent, potential, current job, or where I grew up.”
To decide, “I have time to learn a new language because it’s important to me,” instead of saying, “I’m too busy, I can’t (or don’t deserve to) do anything nice for myself.”
Good or bad, beneficial or misguided, constraints are always there.
Because life constantly forces you to make decisions, and every decision leads to a new constraint.
Since it’s challenging to be aware of your decisions and their long-term constraining effects, which constraints do you consider important enough to set consciously (and spend considerable time and effort doing so)?
Where do you allow others to dictate the constraints you live within?
Who do you allow to dictate the constraints you live within?
Pick your freedom battles.
