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    #257 Not pleasant, but predictable

    Getting worked up about traffic jams is not pleasant, but it’s predictable. And addictive.

    So is giving up on writing a book, quitting a workout regime, and re-living any conflict or failure.

    Not pleasant. But predictable.

    This is how you’ve always felt. And this is how you’ll always feel – unless you become aware of the unpleasant, predictable, addictive patterns and decide to act differently.

    Not only once, not twice, but every time you become aware of the pattern until you’ve built enough self-trust that you know the unpleasant predictable events aren’t inevitable.

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    #208 How to get out of your self-improvement prison

    You feel bad because you don’t write.

    And when you write, you feel bad because you’re scared of the inevitable day you stop writing.

    That’s how you create a self-improvement prison.

    And that prison has only one way out.


    Intend to do what’s good for you.

    Then realize that even if you don’t live up to that standard all the time, you’re still worthy of self-love and self-trust.

    Focus on intention, not outcome.

    Focus on cultivating elastic discipline rather than on becoming a habit hardliner.

    Focus on the general direction of your life, not a day-by-day judgment of your every action.

    Maintain a majority vote for who you want to be.

    Realize you’re not going to be perfect today – and being perfect isn’t the goal anyway.

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    #89 Don’t get it backwards

    I’m not writing because I can’t write?
    I’m not playing the guitar because I’m bad at music?
    I’m not learning a language because I’m bad at learning languages?

    That’s the world on its head.

    The truth is: you can’t write because you’re not writing.
    You can’t play the guitar because you’re not playing the guitar.
    You can’t speak the language because you’re not learning the language.

    If you would write every day, cognitive dissonance starts doing its work. Your actions will overrule your thoughts and beliefs.

    And every day you write, you’re becoming a writer.

    Every day you play the guitar, you’re becoming a guitar player.

    Every day you learn a language, you’re becoming a language learner.

    The only reason you can’t do it because you’re not doing it.

    Don’t get it backwards.

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    #109 Now is the time to put my heart on the line

    Now is the time to put my heart on the line.

    Because whatever I do at this very moment is a direct vote for who I want to be.

    But before I let the gravity of the moment paralyze me, I realize – this is not my first vote, and it won’t be my last.

    Another present moment will soon arrive, and with the passing of time, another opportunity to put my heart on the line.


    Too much pressure on one moment leads to perfectionism and paralysis.

    Too much focus on “this one moment doesn’t matter” leads to defeatism and lethargy.

    Be intentional about the present moment because it’s the only vote you can directly influence.

    Then be aware of the aggregate of your actions because your identity emerges from the majority of your votes.

    Who do you choose to be?

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    #8 Musenküsse

    klimt-the-kiss-musenkuss
    Gustav Klimt’s The Kiss (1907-1908).

    der Musenkuss (German) The kiss of the Muse

    Creativity becomes much easier if you see it as a game of finding new ways of describing what has always been there.

    Observing, rather than inventing.

    It’s liberating. Because now the game changes from pulling ideas out of thin air to a game of discovery. Observation. Paying attention. Building upon what’s already discovered, then connecting the dots in way nobody else has.

    Most of all: listening, when the muse finally arrives and visits you for a kiss.

    There’s this voice in my mind
    Impossible to ignore
    And yet I fill my head with noise
    Drowning out
    What deep down I know to be true
    Do I even want to admit
    That this song in my heart
    Is not about me
    But about you?

    P.S.: I’ve observed the same principle in language learning (and wrote a book about the consequences of this mindset shift).

    Which begs the question…

    Where else would we do better if we observed a bit more, rather than trying to invent from scratch?

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