Why do you love writing, despite the fact that the act of writing is often a drag?
Why do you love running, despite the fact that the act of going for a run is often a chore?
Why do you love learning languages, despite the fact that the act of practicing is often riddled with frustration?
Why do you love it so much?
And wouldn’t it feel good to remind yourself of that love every day… so you make sure the love is there to stay?
You kind of want to run a marathon.
You kind of want to eat better.
You kind of want to move more.
You kind of want to feel better.
And everything kind of stays the same.
Only when “kind of” becomes “absolutely” and “want to” becomes “choose to” change happens.
I absolutely choose to write.
I absolutely choose to run a marathon.
I absolutely choose to eat better.
I absolutely choose to move more.
I absolutely choose to do whatever it takes to feel better.
Because there is no other way.
For all the languages I’ve learned
trying in vain to put the inner and outer world into words
closely but not completely capturing the essence
I now realize the biggest insights reveal themselves
where words are worthless and feelings reign
where they are felt and lived, embodied,
refusing to be rationalized, categorized
or undergo the violent limitations of our words.
Maybe language learning is more about admitting that some languages are lived, not learned.
That some insights are felt, not expressed.
That sometimes words create distance from what we experience deep down, instead of offering the clarity we seek.
Accepting that may well be the biggest challenge of all.
There is a voice that doesn’t use words. Listen.
Rumi
Achieving an outcome without the daily actions that lead to an identity shift is empty and unsustainable.
I may want to publish a book. But if someone writes the whole book without my input and I put my name on it in the end, do I deserve to call it my book?
I have a book. But I’m not a writer. And I’m not an author.
I may want to have a million dollars. But if tomorrow I win the lottery or receive a large inheritance without any action from my side, what does that mean?
I have a million dollars. But I’m not wealthy – and research suggests that without proper guidance, I’ll spend it all, ending up back at square one.
It works the other way around, too. You can blindly chase an outcome (or slip into bad habits) without considering how the actions you need to take to get there will change you as a person.
Depending on your actions to get there, chasing fame can make you happy – or very unhappy. Writing a book can make you happy or very unhappy. Building a hugely successful company can make you happy or very unhappy.
The value, satisfaction, and resentment are all in the actions, not the outcome.
I don’t care what I write.
I care that I write.
Because only once the daily act of writing isn’t in question anymore, can I start writing what matters.
Intellectually understanding that the perfect speech includes a strong opening, humor, a dramatic demonstration, rhetorical elements, and emotional appeal doesn’t mean your next speech will contain those elements right away – and that’s okay.
You don’t have to master this today.
Intellectually understanding the nuances and body positioning of a yoga pose doesn’t mean the next time you stand in that pose, you’ll perform it perfectly right away – and that’s okay.
You don’t have to master this today.
Intellectually understanding verbs, tenses, or case systems in a foreign language doesn’t mean you’ll be able to use them correctly in conversations right away – and that’s okay.
You don’t have to master this today.
Turning intellectual understanding into internalized knowledge and skill is a slow, layered process:
It’s not about the book; it’s about the fact that you started writing consistently.
It’s not about the marathon; it’s about the fact that you started practicing diligently.
Achievements are the results that will soon become a distant memory.
Habits are the results you’ll carry with you for a lifetime.
