People can think you’re not good at writing, and you can still write – and love it.
You can think you’re not good at writing, and you can still write – and love it.
You can think you’ll never be good at writing, and you can still write – and love it.
Because whether you’re good at something or not is nowhere nearly as relevant as how fulfilled it makes you feel.
When chasing fame leads to your own kids not remembering your name.
When chasing love leads to fear of being alone.
When chasing success leads to loneliness.
It may be necessary.
It may be good.
It may be worth it.
As long as you’re aware there’s always a sacrifice to make.
Starting a new habit seems to come with three universal “self-trust issues”:
Trust in my Intentions. “Do I even have the time for this? Does making time for this make me selfish… Is it even good for me to spend time on this, out of all the priorities in life? Will this do me in any good in the long term?”
Trust in my Ability to follow through. “I’ll probably give up at the first opportunity, and then beat myself up again for not following through.”
Trust in my Skills. “Am I even good enough? I don’t notice any improvement, I don’t think this is working for me. I don’t think I can do this.”
(Source: Eben Pagan)
And even though I’ve slowly been gaining trust across all three dimensions in the past two years…
Whenever I start something new – like publishing a daily insight – the same trust issues resurface.
“Trust in my ability to follow through” is a particularly tough cookie. Not a day goes by without a self-defeating and endlessly annoying voice whispering in my ear: “Go ahead, try me. See how long you last before you return with another habit you gave up on…”
Which leads me to the Completion Paradox:
Trust in my ability to complete things is not a prerequisite to get started. It’s earned through getting started in the first place and then, slowly, but surely, day by day, following through. Completing something every single day. Proving to myself that I can, in fact, trust myself to follow through. Building up that self-trust every day through tiny trust builders.
So… the questions I keep in mind today:
Taking it one step further:
And with those questions in mind, I realize a simple thought can put my mind at ease…
“It’s all fine… I’ve been through this before.”
Because when my dreams start drowning in doubts
And desire turns into despair
When I suddenly see what I always had in me
Who I could be
Yet my thoughts already declare defeat
I step back
Look back
Feel back
And when at last I notice
That day by day,
I’m finally unleashing the calling I’ve always ignored
I remind myself
It’s all fine. I’ve been through this before.
And the next day, it rains.
And the next day, the sun shines bright.
And every day, we show up, and we fight.
Yesterday could’ve been the day the talking stopped
And the doing started.
So could be today.
What’s stopping you?
Every day we spend another day of our lives.
Where do I spend it?
Why?
Who do I spend it with?
Why?
What do I spend it on?
Why?
What’s it all about?
As I gain more expertise in a certain field, I expect my posts on that topic to get shorter.
Because raw material starts with a lot of fluff, and only through sculpting away, day by day do I get closer to the essence.
So…
If my posts on a topic I’m familiar with are getting longer on average, I’m off-track.
If they become more abstract, I’m getting off-track.
In other words…
When I don’t yet have so much to say
I can’t stop talking
Until I sculpt away
Realize
Some words matter more than others
And what’s left is
Enough
