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    #22 Actions Overrule Thoughts

    One of the most potent drivers of change AND perpetuators of old habits is cognitive dissonance:

    In the field of psychology, cognitive dissonance is the perception of contradictory information, and the mental toll of it. Relevant items of information include a person’s actions, feelings, ideas, beliefs, values, and things in the environment. Cognitive dissonance is typically experienced as psychological stress when persons participate in an action that goes against one or more of those things.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_dissonance

    What’s interesting about cognitive dissonance is that both “sides” of the dissonance are not equal:

    If you think one thing, but you do something else, eventually you’ll start believing what you do, not what you think.

    In other words: actions overrule thoughts.

    1. If I tell myself I can’t write a daily post (thought) and I don’t write a daily post (action), I perpetuate the belief.
    2. If I tell myself I can’t write a daily post (thought) but I gain enough courage and I actually do write a daily post (action), I will start shifting my belief towards the actions I’m taking. In other words: I’ll start believing I can write a daily post.
    3. If I tell myself I can write a daily post (thought), but I never actually write that daily post (action), then my belief will start shifting again, and I’ll start believing I can’t write a daily post.
    4. If I tell myself I can write a daily post (thought) and I do write a daily post (action), my belief grows stronger.

    We usually start in the first scenario until we gain enough leverage over ourselves to change our actions. The moment we change our actions to actions that conflict with our thoughts/beliefs, we’re creating cognitive dissonance.

    Then, if we follow through with our new actions, our beliefs start to change.

    The big turning point is that moment where you start taking a different action.

    Which begs the question:

    • How can we gain enough leverage over ourselves to go against our beliefs and change our actions for the better?
    • How can we make it so important to us to change (or so painful NOT to change) that we start taking different actions?

    Identify your leverage points that jolt you into action, and you gain power over your beliefs and identity.

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    #193 How do you react?

    You want to get the guitar piece exactly right but still trip up once in a while. How do you react?

    You want to run a marathon but can’t even finish half a marathon yet. How do you react?

    You want to explain how you feel but end up feeling misunderstood. How do you react?

    Do you let frustration hold you back?

    Or do you use the gap as leverage to change your actions and bridge the gap between your current and desired identity?

  • #439 Resolve can bring you far

    I can’t predict what will happen tomorrow – or even today.

    But I do know that today, I resolve to write.

    And tomorrow I resolve to write once again.

    And that resolve has brought me to 439 consecutive days of writing.

    439 days of writing, despite living in an unpredictable world.

    439 days of realizing most obstacles are excuses.

    439 days of proving that resolve can bring you pretty far.

2 Comments

  1. Wow! I am 63yr old and wish I would have been contemplating these 3 questions earlier in my life! How would I be different today? And how would my responses to life’s circumstances have modeled a new way to think for my children? I can’t change the past, but I can make better choices going forward! And I intend to do it very intentionally! Thank you!!

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