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    #98 The Socializing-Solitude Alternation

    Appreciation arises from contrast.

    How can I enjoy food without knowing what it’s like to be hungry?

    How can I appreciate the beauty of a painting without comparing it to something I’ve experienced as ugly?

    How can I appreciate social connections without being familiar with solitude? (Not loneliness. Solitude.)

    Constant connectivity (especially shallow connections through social media apps) without breaks from socializing numbs the whole bonding experience.

    Alternating socializing with solitude warms the heart.


    Inspired by Cal Newport’s excellent book Digital Minimalism.

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    #105 This is how you make the future yours

    When it comes to habits, our actions in the present make future present moments more (or less) likely.

    Do I journal today? That’s a vote for my journaling identity – which increases the likelihood of another journaling moment tomorrow. Predictive power.

    Do I check Instagram today? That’s a vote for my Instagram-browsing identity – which increases the likelihood of another Instagram moment tomorrow. Predictive power.

    Have I journaled 700 days in a row? I can say quite confidently I’ll journal again tomorrow. Massive predictive power.

    So how do change the future?

    Weaken the predictive power of one habit – stop taking the actions you want to change.

    Strengthen the predictive power of a new habit – intentionally start taking different actions, and let every present moment be a vote for that new habit (and new identity).

    The process is challenging and slow.

    You’ll need patience.

    Willpower to resist the pull of habits that have already accumulated tremendous predictive power.

    You’ll need presence of mind and perseverance to choose new actions because you know they’re important to you.

    It’s challenging. Slow. And worth it.

    Because this is how you make the future yours.

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    #274 On endings and beginnings

    Does a day end, or does a new one start?

    Does the end of a book chapter signal termination, or does it serve as a gateway to an unexplored continuation?

    Maybe we don’t need to arbitrarily mark endings and beginnings in lives that consist of an uninterrupted flow.

    Maybe we’re just a tiny plot in a story spanning billions of years.

    Maybe we don’t grasp the bigger story anyway.

    Maybe it’s all the same.

  • #472 Don’t be a prisoner of your dreams

    What you used to have was okay – and probably enough.

    What you have today is okay – and probably enough.

    What you’ll have tomorrow will be okay – and probably enough.

    You can believe you didn’t always have everything you needed – but don’t be a prisoner of your past.

    You can always believe you deserve more – but don’t be a prisoner of your dreams.

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    #73 Why am I rushing?

    Journaling question of the day: Why am I rushing?

    Out of habit and automaticity – mindlessness caused by endless repetition?

    Out of discomfort – I want to get out of this situation as soon as possible?

    Out of impatience – I expect whatever comes next to be more interesting or riveting?

    What would happen if I don’t rush this?

    By interrupting the automaticity and slowing down, will I reopen my senses and discover new nuances?

    By not rushing away from discomfort, will I discover everything is not as bad as I feared it would be?

    By resisting impatience, can I become fascinated with whatever is happening right here, right now?

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