#414 What you’re doing things for
You don’t always need to know what you’re doing things for before you do them.
Sometimes you have to do them first, before you can figure out what you’re doing them for.
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#176 Cling and let go
ByLukasWe cling the most, not to our prized possessions we worked hard to obtain, but to the painful patterns that both hurt us AND keep us comfortable.
Some questions to ask yourself today:
Who do I want to be?
Which actions will turn me into the person I want to be?
Which actions STOP me from turning into that person I want to be?
Which of my actions, habits, and tendencies am I frustrated about, but simultaneously perpetuating?
Which painful patterns am I scared to let go of because they have been instrumental in making me who I am today?
#357 Can you be a successful writer without this?
ByLukasI’ve met many aspiring writers who weren’t writing regularly.
But I’ve never met a successful writer who wasn’t writing regularly.
Or yogis.
Or musicians.
Or athletes.
#242 The accomplishments that slipped away
ByLukasOver the years, I’ve become quite skilled at letting present worries overshadow past triumphs.
But what would it be like to let past triumphs overshadow present worries?
And what would it be like to have present triumphs overshadow past worries?
Maybe you know better than me, my friend. Or maybe it’s something you’d like to practice too.
Here’s a journal prompt to get us started:
What’s a forgotten accomplishment from your past that once filled you with pride but has since slipped away from your thoughts?
#181 You’re never done
ByLukasYou can labor for years on a business with little results until suddenly it blows up.
Then after enjoying your breakthrough, you continue your journey until the next big jump.
You’re never done building your business.
You can practice a yoga pose for months with little results until suddenly your body understands, and you’re able to perform it.
Then after enjoying your breakthrough, you continue your journey of discovery.
You’re never done practicing yoga.
You can practice a language for months without being able to string together any sentences until suddenly, your brain understands, and you’re able to speak with ease.
Then after enjoying your breakthrough, you’ll continue your language-learning journey.
You’re never done learning a language.
#24 Put your actions where your mouth is
ByLukasHere’s a useful insight from James Clear, author of Atomic Habits:
Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.
https://jamesclear.com/3-2-1/june-4-2020Writing every day reaffirms my “I’m a writer” identity.
Sitting on the couch every day reaffirms my “I’m a couch potato” identity.
As a consequence: when you change your actions and your identity starts shifting to align with those actions.
And that’s how we get out of a rut.
(The opposite isn’t always true: changing your thoughts without changing your actions will rarely shift your identity. I can think of being a writer as much as I want, if I never put any words on paper, I’m not a writer. That’s one of the principle of cognitive dissonance: Actions overrule Thoughts.)
Here’s how to change your actions and your identity:
- First, you decide who you want to be (and what your new identity looks like).
“I want to be a yogi: someone who regularly practices yoga and takes care of his mind and body.” - Second you get clear on what that would look like in your daily life: which actions you’ll take that are different from the ones you’re taking right now.
“Instead of watching TV before, my “yogi identity” would do a daily yoga session. - Third, you gain enough leverage over yourself to go against your current habits, and take those different action for a prolonged period of time.
This is where most resistance comes up, because my old “couch potato identity” is fighting my “yogi” identity — and through my past actions, the couch potato has received WAY more votes than the yogi.
So you need perseverance at this stage. Remember, every time you take those new actions, you’re voting for your new identity and new habits are taking roots. - At some point, you reach a tipping point productivity experts call “habit escape velocity“: you now have so much momentum that you’re out of the sphere of influence of your old habits, and your new habits (and new identity) can take root.
Which begs the question…
Where are you saying you want to be a certain way, but you’re voting for something else through your daily actions?
Lukas Van VyvePut your money (or your actions) where your mouth is.
- First, you decide who you want to be (and what your new identity looks like).
#407 You won’t achieve your greatest desires
ByLukasWriting every day won’t always help you achieve your greatest desires.
But it might help you lose them — when you realize that what you really wanted was not the outcome, but the feeling of consciously choosing who you want to be, and consciously acting in alignment with that choice.
Once the desires have fallen away, all that remains is the fulfillment every day.
You can relax now.