#505 Questions to uncover your passion

The other day you asked about my favorite words.

But what I really want to write about is my favorite questions.

Because as much as words can spark imagination, questions are what steer the mind – to good places or bad.

Consider this one:

“Why do I always give up when I start a new habit?“

This presupposes that I always give up and will ask my brain to come up with reasons (and excuses) to justify and perpetuate that behavior.

• Why do I always get frustrated when something doesn’t go my way?
• Why do I always wait until the last minute to start on a project, so I get stressed and barely meet the deadline?
• Why do I always give up when I start writing and publishing daily?

And off I go, finding excuses for behavior, thus perpetuation.

“Look at all the reasons I found for behaving this way. I may not like it, but I guess this is who I am.”

Why would you send your mind there… If you could also ask yourself a question like:

“What would it feel like if I were already writing and publishing every day?”

How would I feel about myself…

How would I look at myself?

What would I say, what would I create… How would I act?

Which obstacles would I have conquered?

Which excuses would have become irrelevant, making me shake my head, saying to myself, “How did I ever let that stop me?”

And just like that, with my imagination set free

internal resistance melting away

off I go

finally becoming who I’ve always wanted to be.

P.S: If you MUST ask the “Why do I always…” questions, at least use them to justify and perpetuate positive behavior.

Why do I always wake up and immediately write three pages stream of consciousness?

• Because it helps me slow down.
• Because it makes me aware of negative (and positive thought patterns).
• Because I feel calm after writing them.
• Because ever since I started, more creative, productive, and disciplined
• Because this is who I am now. And I love this version of me much more than the one from before I started writing every day.

P.P.S.: Alright then, one more question to think (or journal) about:

Where am I perpetuating a situation or habit I say I don’t want but I secretly cling to because it feels comfortable and has become part of my identity?

If you truly want to build a habit, you shouldn’t be able to hide behind excuses or vague commitments.

Which means the habit needs to be transparent.

Did you write one sentence today?

Did you learn one word in your target language today?

Did you run one mile today?

Some find transparency empowering.

Some think it’s scary.

But everyone who has built a habit knows this is the way.

Whenever you set out to establish a new habit, there’s often a nagging thought at the back of your mind wondering, “When will you quit this time?”

But the naysayer in your head that has had free reign for all these years can’t be silenced.

They can only be proven wrong.

“You expect me to quit? Watch me.”

“Say whatever you want; I am showing up today.”

Tiny Trust Builders, day after day, until the naysayer admits, “I was wrong. You’re not that person anymore.”

When everything is urgent, how do we know what to do first?

One solution is adding more nuance:

What’s the most urgent?

What’s the most important?

Breathing is urgent.

A crying child is urgent.

A toilet visit can be urgent.

Sending that email out tonight right before bed instead of tomorrow, maybe not so much?

Here’s the important question:

If you’re going to prioritize the urgent matters anyway, why stress yourself out by calling everything urgent in the first place?

Making everything urgent devalues truly urgent matters.

Because when everything is urgent, nothing is urgent anymore.

Admiring (flawed) early work is easy when we already know the late work is going to be great.

Everyone forgives Picasso or Da Vinci for a lousy early sketch. In fact, people pay good money to hang one in their living room.

Maybe the early work, showing that even the greats are mere mortals on a journey towards excellence, is the most valuable?

And yet, it’s much harder to be gentle on a beginning artist for shipping mediocre creative work – not in the least for the beginning artist themselves – when their path to excellence hasn’t unfolded yet.

After all, something that one day will be “my early work” is still “my current best work” today.

The road to excellence is invisible from the trenches.

But that doesn’t mean it isn’t there.

Which makes me wonder…

When I know that through persistence and daily practice, one day, I’ll look back on today’s creation, smiling, thinking: “Oh how far I’ve come… How much I’ve learned… And some of this was actually pretty good…”

Can I admire my creative work less for what it looks, feels, or sounds like, and more for who I’m becoming through making it?

Can I do the same for the creative projects of others?

With that mindset… How much easier and forgiving would the daily creative journey be?