#83 Want vs Choose
When I don’t want to want anymore, and choose to act instead, I start becoming who I’ve always wanted to be.
Not right away. But day by day.
Lukas Van Vyve
Similar Posts
#390 Make the daily practice easy
ByLukasThe trick to successful habit-building: make daily practice easy.
We often do the opposite: we make weekly practice hard.
If I tell myself I’m going to post one long blog post every week, I’ll find a million reasons not to write for the first six days until I have no choice but to write.
But if I tell myself I will post daily, the longest I can procrastinate is… 12 hours?
And after a week, I’ve practiced my publishing habit 7 times.
So it goes for meditation, yoga, running, and any skill or habit.
Make the daily practice easy.
#425 Just one more
ByLukasOne more word.
One more practice run.
One more yoga session.
One more moment of doing what’s important to you.
One more moment that brings you closer to who you choose to be.
Just one more.
#141 Positive reinforcement
ByLukasWalk for 5 minutes today? That’s excellent – because you walked.
Meditated for 1 min? That’s perfect – because you meditated.
Wrote and published a 50-word blog post? That’s enough – because you wrote and published.
You’re allowe dto
Positive reinforcement through Tiny Trust Builders is all you need.
#334 Writing isn’t hard
ByLukasWriting isn’t hard. Writing every day is – until it isn’t anymore.
That’s when writing becomes hard.
Build the habit, then you get a shot at building the skill.
#179 Intellectual understanding vs Internalized knowledge
ByLukasIntellectually understanding that the perfect speech includes a strong opening, humor, a dramatic demonstration, rhetorical elements, and emotional appeal doesn’t mean your next speech will contain those elements right away – and that’s okay.
You don’t have to master this today.
Intellectually understanding the nuances and body positioning of a yoga pose doesn’t mean the next time you stand in that pose, you’ll perform it perfectly right away – and that’s okay.
You don’t have to master this today.
Intellectually understanding verbs, tenses, or case systems in a foreign language doesn’t mean you’ll be able to use them correctly in conversations right away – and that’s okay.
You don’t have to master this today.
Turning intellectual understanding into internalized knowledge and skill is a slow, layered process:
- Intellectually understand which things to do differently from before.
- Mindfully become aware of the moment when you need to do things differently.
- Do things differently from before.
- Repeat every day.
#175 Perpetuating painful comfort
ByLukasWe naturally move towards pleasure and away from pain – with one exception: painful comfort.
If you’re used to believing that you’re bad at languages, there’s painful comfort in struggling with languages.
If you’re used to negative self-talk, there’s painful comfort in negative self-talk.
If you’re used to working 12-hour days, there’s painful comfort in working 12-hour days.
If you’re used to constant conflict, there’s painful comfort in constant conflict.
If you’re used to neglect, there’s painful comfort in neglect.
Painful comfort is keeping you comfortable AND hurting you.
Years of conditioning have given it an irresistible pull – until you decide to take a leap of faith and start believing that you, too, can change.
Where are you perpetuating painful comfort in life?