#159 What unintentional living looks like

ByLukas
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Unintentional living and identity building look like this:

  1. Actions are inspired by pain and pleasure.
  2. Repeated pain and pleasure lead to repeated actions.
  3. Repeated actions lead to habits.
  4. Habits shape your identity.

“Life made me who I am, and I can’t do anything about it.”

Intentional living and identity building look like this:

  1. Who do I want to be? What’s my desired identity?
  2. Which habits that would turn me into that person do I not have in place right now?
  3. Which repeated actions that would build that habit am I not currently taking?
  4. Which reactions to pain and pleasure triggers in my life can I change? Which pain and pleasure triggers can I ban out of my life completely?

“While the past has shaped me, the way I choose to live my life today, tomorrow, and every day after, will determine who I am.”

You’re living anyway. Your actions are votes for an identity anyway. So you might as well do it intentionally.

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#426 Back again

ByLukas

You’ll end up in the season of distraction.

And then you’ll be back again.

You’ll end up in the season of rest.

And then you’ll be back again.

You’ll end up in the season of turmoil.

And then you’ll be back again.

And the more you go “back again” to a path, the stronger that default path becomes.

Choose it wisely.

#356 Don’t be guilted into discipline

ByLukas

You don’t become truly happy when a Duolingo owl, notifications, or leaderboards guilted them into spending hours on their phone – even if they learn something.

Could we create learning environments that build self-trust (you showed up because it’s important for you to show up)?

Discipline (I stuck to my plan and I feel good about it)?

Agency (I chose to do this today)?

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#187 Causality on its head

ByLukas

You don’t have to feel certain to start taking action.

You take action to start feeling certain.

You don’t need to be calm to do yoga.

You do yoga to become calm.

You don’t need to have a quiet mind to meditate.

You meditate to cultivate a quiet mind.

You don’t have to speak Spanish fluently to have a conversation in Spanish.

You have a conversation in Spanish to learn to speak Spanish fluently.

You don’t need to know how to love to start loving someone.

You start loving someone to learn how to love.

And while this chain of causality sounds logical, sometimes the logical things are the hardest to remember.

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#182 Uncertain future visions

ByLukas

I can say I want to run a marathon, write a book, or have a successful career – which doesn’t mean I’ll actually end up running a marathon, writing a book, or having a successful career.

But if I’m serious about it, it does mean I’ll take daily steps towards that goal – daily actions that will change my identity.

Can I live with the present-day implications of my uncertain future visions?

If I don’t know yet if I’ll ever write the book – will these daily actions still be fulfilling to me?

Will they make me happier?

Will I be happy with the person I become by taking such daily actions?

Do these daily actions contribute to a fulfilling emotional, mental, physical, and social life?

If not, am I willing to make emotional, mental, physical, or social sacrifices?

This is a choice everyone makes for themselves.

But I don’t want to make my present day miserable for an uncertain vision of the future I don’t even know will happen.

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