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  • #27 Appreciating the meaningless melody of a foreign language

    Learning a foreign language is both a frustrating and liberating experience.

    We can focus on the frustration of not understanding the words the way we understand our mother tongue. Or we can realize that without the words, we are free to fall back on other ways of capturing and understanding meaning.

    A crying baby can be soothed by words it does not yet understand, because she senses what’s behind the sounds, lets the meaningless melody cradle her to sleep…

    Similarly, we don’t always have to know what’s behind the words, as long as we make an effort to understand the meaning behind the sounds.

    Hearing a foreign language brings us back to that wordless world the way we experienced it as a newborn, before we tried so hard to put everything within and around us into language.

    It makes us remember, there’s more to life than our words will ever allow us to express. And somehow, that’s a soothing thought.

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    #21 Action Defies Excuses (day 20 update)

    Day 20 of my daily publishing experiment. What I’ve learned (or remembered) so far:

    • Self-trust is built by taking action. On some days I woke up stressed out, thinking “I have no clue what I’ll post about today”. But then I start writing, and the post reveals itself on the page every single time. After experiencing that several times, the fear of posting (or not being able to write anything) is fading away. In other words: action defies excuses.
    • Starting to journal (Morning Pages) over 600 days ago led to an explosion in creativity. Starting to publish a daily insight is giving me a similar boost.
    • In the past, I leaned towards bigger, longer writing projects that required a lot of energy and thinking before I produced something “valuable”. I now see there’s power in consistently writing short posts about ideas and insights, no matter how insignificant and no matter how imperfect the writing. Because through the writing, I understand them better. I remember them better. And I’m confident that over time, from all these small insights, bigger ideas will emerge.

    In short, a pattern I’ve observed many time in the past years is playing out again:

    When I start defying my own excuses by taking action, no matter how small, my self-trust grows, my self-image shifts, and I become more of the person I want to be.

    Which begs the question:

    Where else am I frustrated, holding on to a static identity of the past that I could prove wrong by taking action?

  • #244 What am I meant to do today

    “What am I meant to do?” I often wonder.

    You may have the same question on your mind.

    Or maybe you don’t think about it at all, my friend. And perhaps that’s the better choice.

    The search for purpose may not be about finding that one grand mission.

    Maybe it’s about creating tiny ripples of influence right where we are with what we have.

    Maybe the right question is, “What am I meant to do today?”

    That way, we make each day matter in ways big and small.

    Because these are the days we live anyway.

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    #180 Progressive Insight

    Performance gap: the frustrating gap between how you know something should be done in an ideal world and how you currently do it. 

    One implication of the performance gap: you don’t have to master this skill today.

    Another implication, maybe even more important: your idea of how something “should be done” is probably wrong anyway.

    Because as you practice and gain mastery, you’ll also gain progressive insight: a more nuanced intellectual understanding of the skill you’re practicing.

    What I thought was a “good” yoga session six months ago, I now see as a session full of misalignment and cramped muscles.

    What I thought of as a solid piece of writing six months ago, I now see as an argument full of holes and points of improvement.

    Sometimes, progressive insight is just about more nuances.

    Sometimes, progressive insight shows that your initial intellectual understanding completely missed the mark.

    There’s only one way to find out: practice: Sculpt away, day by day. 

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    #139 Habit Milestones

    The most important habit milestone is the center of gravity shift.

    Initially, when you start building a new skill, your center of gravity lies with your old identity. You’re constantly fighting the pull of your old identity. And if you’d stop for even a day, you’ll get pulled right back into your old habits.

    “If I don’t write today, what does that say about me? I’ve always given up in the past, and with this habit, it’ll be the same.”

    The center of gravity shift happens when you’re about to miss a day and realize:

    “It doesn’t matter, tomorrow I’ll start again anyway.”

    When you’ve cast so many votes for your “identity of perseverance” you know that missing one day doesn’t equal giving up anymore.

    When not writing for a day has become the exception, and when it happens, I get pulled right back into my writing habit.

    Before the shift happens, when you’re still building self-trust, discipline is key.

    But after your center of gravity has shifted to align with what you want to do anyway… you’re free.

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