#218 The United States of “If I wanted, I could”

ByLukas
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The path toward self-awareness isn’t always pleasant. 

Take yesterday, when I realized that in many cases, I’m more interested in the comfort of “wanting” something I don’t have than in “taking action to get something.”

That unappealing realization triggered a cascade of even more unappealing questions.

Would I rather mess around with small blog posts instead of becoming a skilled writer crafting coherent arguments?

Would I rather learn about a million different strategies to grow a newsletter instead of actually spreading the word and getting more people to read my newsletter?

Would I rather learn how to learn a language than actually learn a new language?

Is the frustration of unrealized potential also a huge source of comfort in my life?

I’m not sure if I should be happy with that realization. 

Maybe realizations aren’t even supposed to make me happy.

But even if they were, it doesn’t matter. 

Because look: here I am, writing another insight about it.

Another Tiny Trust Builder, proving that every day, I am one step closer to renouncing my citizenship of the United States of “If I wanted, I could.”

Another reminder to myself and you, my friend, one I’ll repeat until the bitter end: actions overrule thoughts.

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    #214 Who’s in charge right now?

    ByLukas

    Habit hardliner. Epicurean. Ruthless achiever. Compassionate pushover.

    I identify with all of the above, my friend. And even though they can all be positive, I’m pretty good at letting those qualities shine in the wrong situations.

    The habit hardliner over-disciplining themselves and those around them.

    The epicurean making indulgent food decisions every day.

    The ruthless achiever neglecting their family.

    The compassionate guy being a pushover in business negotiations.

    So more out of necessity than ambition, I started asking myself: Who’s in charge right now?

    Are they the adequate identity to be in charge in whatever situation you’re in?

    It’s insightful. Not always fun. But insightful.

    And as you know by now, I like to share insights with you, my friend. Because who knows, maybe one day, one of these insights will be enlightening to you, too?

    So I invite you to give it a try.

    Right here, right now: who’s in charge?

    Maybe you’ve let some of your qualities shine in the wrong situations too.

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    #60 Memory is context

    ByLukas

    Memory is context – in language and in general.

    Context of words surrounded by other words and sounds within a sentence.

    • apple orchard

    Context of words surrounded by actions – actor, action, object affected (in whatever way or order your mother tongue expresses it).

    • I pick an apple from the tree.

    Context of words and the images they spur.

    • An apple falls on Newton’ head.
    • An apple falls off a tree in my grandparents’ garden.
    • I bite into a green apple – a bit sour. I don’t like it.
    • The first time I combine an apple part with peanut butter. Delicious.

    Context of words and the feelings they evoke.

    • I’m thirsty and hungry after a volleyball game. The first bite of an apple – what a relief.
    • My grandpa cuts an apple and gives me a part. Safety. Home.
    • I eat 2 apples and my mouth starts itching. Allergy? Fear.

    When learning another language, you can link words to the context of your mother tongue.

    But to truly understand them, you’ll have to create a new context too.

    For example, an apple in Spanish: una manzana.

    Seemingly the same object, now perceived through new sounds.

    • huerto de manzanas (apple orchard)

    New actions.

    • Yo limpio una manzana. (I wash/clean an apple.)

    New images.

    • I see una manzana in a Mexican supermarket. Someone is polishing it with wax to make it extra shiny. The first time I saw was in Mexico. So I didn’t see the guy polishing an apple. Vi a un hombre encerando una manzana. (I saw a guy putting wax on an apple.)

    New feelings.

    • Compré una manzana (I bought an apple) and ate it without washing it well. My stomach wasn’t happy with my actions.

    Keeping all that in mind, are we really still talking about the same object? Is the Spanish manzana encerada that made me sick in Spanish the same as the apple my grandpa helped me pick? If it is, do I now have a richer perception of that object that once up on a time, I could only interact with through the limits of one language?

    Learning vocabulary lists with isolated words will never get you fluent in a foreign language.

    If you don’t build a new context of sounds, actions, images, feelings, you’ll always keep imposing your mother tongue on the foreign language.

    That’s why you can’t just learn a foreign language. You have to live it.

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    #280 Sway with the day-to-day

    ByLukas

    Can’t write at your usual time? Sway, and write later in the day anyway.

    A work project doesn’t go your way? Sway, remember your ultimate goal, and keep going anyway.

    Can’t go for your usual run because your knee hurts when you woke up? Sway, realize there are more ways to prepare for a marathon than just running, then do a prep session anyway.

    If you don’t want to let the day-to-day sway you in your purpose, you must sway with the day-to-day.

    When things don’t go your way, sway – but find a way to make progress anyway.

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