#130 The perfect excuse

ByLukas
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Perfectionism is the perfect excuse for not showing up.

If you don’t publish because you’re waiting for the perfect blog post, you’ll hide behind your desk forever – because there’ll always be something you can improve.

If you don’t go for a walk because you’re waiting for the perfect weather, you’ll be stuck forever inside – because there’ll always be a day with more sunshine or a nicer breeze.

If you wait to live the life you desire until you have the perfect age, amount of money, degree, or partner, you’ll wait until it’s too late to enjoy your life in the first place.

If you know things will never be perfect anyway, and you’re not allowed to wait until they’re perfect, or even until they’re “good enough”…

What could you start doing today? What have you been putting off?

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    #262 How to feel more fulfillment right now

    ByLukas

    Fulfillment doesn’t come from closing the gap between wanting and having.

    It comes from closing the gap between wanting and doing.

    Want to write a book? Then write every day – even if you don’t have the book yet.

    Want to start a successful business? Then start the business – even if you’re not successful yet.

    Want to run a marathon? Then run every day – even if you haven’t run a marathon yet.

    After all, you might never close the gap between wanting and having.

    But the gap between wanting and doing, you can close right this very moment.

  • |

    #24 Put your actions where your mouth is

    ByLukas

    Here’s a useful insight from James Clear, author of Atomic Habits:

    Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.

    https://jamesclear.com/3-2-1/june-4-2020

    Writing every day reaffirms my “I’m a writer” identity.

    Sitting on the couch every day reaffirms my “I’m a couch potato” identity.

    As a consequence: when you change your actions and your identity starts shifting to align with those actions.

    And that’s how we get out of a rut.

    (The opposite isn’t always true: changing your thoughts without changing your actions will rarely shift your identity. I can think of being a writer as much as I want, if I never put any words on paper, I’m not a writer. That’s one of the principle of cognitive dissonance: Actions overrule Thoughts.)

    Here’s how to change your actions and your identity:

    1. First, you decide who you want to be (and what your new identity looks like).
      “I want to be a yogi: someone who regularly practices yoga and takes care of his mind and body.”
    2. Second you get clear on what that would look like in your daily life: which actions you’ll take that are different from the ones you’re taking right now.
      “Instead of watching TV before, my “yogi identity” would do a daily yoga session.
    3. Third, you gain enough leverage over yourself to go against your current habits, and take those different action for a prolonged period of time.
      This is where most resistance comes up, because my old “couch potato identity” is fighting my “yogi” identity — and through my past actions, the couch potato has received WAY more votes than the yogi.
      So you need perseverance at this stage. Remember, every time you take those new actions, you’re voting for your new identity and new habits are taking roots.
    4. At some point, you reach a tipping point productivity experts call “habit escape velocity“: you now have so much momentum that you’re out of the sphere of influence of your old habits, and your new habits (and new identity) can take root.

    Which begs the question…

    Where are you saying you want to be a certain way, but you’re voting for something else through your daily actions?

    Lukas Van Vyve

    Put your money (or your actions) where your mouth is.

  • #4 When the best story in the world has already been written…

    ByLukas

    When the best story in the world has already been written… why do I write?

    Because writing is not a choice – and neither is telling stories.

    Because stories are never finished.

    Because the best stories in the world are written over and over again.

    Because a story well-told depends on who you’re telling it to.

    Because we all tell the same stories anyway, but that one little change, that one new interpretation can make the difference between touching someone or missing the mark.

    But what IS the best story in the world?

    I don’t know.

    I do know they don’t have to be very elaborate to have impact:

    For sale: baby shoes, never worn.

    Ernest Hemingway

    When someone, sometime, stumbled upon six words that can evoke so much… How can I NOT continue my own search for stories and the words to tell them?

    P.S.: Credits to Jony Mitchell for writing the best song in the world.

    P.P.S: Extra credits for singing the most heartfelt version even after suffering a stroke and having to relearn to talk and sing.

    P.P.P.S.: Credits to The Tallest Man on Earth for showing that a new interpretation can make even the best song in the world reach new heights, and providing the inspiration for this post.

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