#209 Self-improvement gap and a pressure trap

ByLukas

Wanting to improve certain areas in your life is powerful.

But that improvement gap comes with a pressure trap.

Because if you believe you’re in control of your actions, the moments you accidentally fall back into old patterns become extra frustrating.

When your self-worth becomes attached to your behavior, every action becomes a judgment of character.

And so the pressure mounts.

Missing one workout means you’re not worthy of running a marathon.

Missing one day of writing means you’ll never be a writer.

Making one communication mistake, making someone angry, means you’re a terrible person.

—

To make that pressure bearable, build self-trust (for example, through Tiny Trust Builders).

Trust that you can run a marathon, even if you miss a workout.

Trust that you can be a writer, even if you miss one day of writing.

Trust that you can be a good person, even if you’ve made mistakes or upset some people.

—

Notice the improvement gap between where you are and where you want to go.

Let the majority of your actions be a vote for the person you want to be.

Focus on elastic discipline, not hardliner habits.

Do all that, and you’ll feel more fulfilled and free.

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    #242 The accomplishments that slipped away

    ByLukas

    Over the years, I’ve become quite skilled at letting present worries overshadow past triumphs.

    But what would it be like to let past triumphs overshadow present worries?

    And what would it be like to have present triumphs overshadow past worries?

    Maybe you know better than me, my friend. Or maybe it’s something you’d like to practice too.

    Here’s a journal prompt to get us started:

    What’s a forgotten accomplishment from your past that once filled you with pride but has since slipped away from your thoughts?

  • | |

    #158 Voting fraud doesn’t exist

    ByLukas

    Voting fraud doesn’t exist in your body and mind.

    You can’t cheat your way into being a writer. Your body and mind count every word as a vote for being a writer.

    You can’t cheat your way into being a runner. Your body and mind count every every stride as a vote for being a runner.

    You can’t cheat your way into being healthy. Your body and mind count every nutrient.

    Luckily, you don’t need a landslide to change your identity. A simple majority is enough to make the power balance tip over.

    Tiny Trust Builders.

  • |

    #187 Causality on its head

    ByLukas

    You don’t have to feel certain to start taking action.

    You take action to start feeling certain.

    You don’t need to be calm to do yoga.

    You do yoga to become calm.

    You don’t need to have a quiet mind to meditate.

    You meditate to cultivate a quiet mind.

    You don’t have to speak Spanish fluently to have a conversation in Spanish.

    You have a conversation in Spanish to learn to speak Spanish fluently.

    You don’t need to know how to love to start loving someone.

    You start loving someone to learn how to love.

    And while this chain of causality sounds logical, sometimes the logical things are the hardest to remember.

  • |

    #260 Dancing circles around your gut

    ByLukas

    You’ll write the book until you start doubting if you have it in you to write it… then realize that the only way to find out is by actually writing the book.

    You’ll prepare for the marathon until you start doubting if you can finish it… then realize that the only way to find out is by actually running the marathon.

    You’ll build the business until you start doubting if this is a viable idea… then realize that the only way to find out is by actually building the business.

    No matter how much you dance circles, ignoring what your gut has been telling you, deep down, you know: this is where you should’ve gone all along.

  • #321 Maintain the momentum

    ByLukas

    You’re likely to encounter consistency challenges.

    After all, nobody feels motivated every day.

    Maybe you’ll have a day where you’re busy or not feeling great, and writing, running, or doing yoga, seems like the last thing you want to do.

    Luckily, you don’t need to feel motivated to write one sentence.

    You don’t even need to want to write to have words appear on the screen or paper.

    You just need to be reminded that you want to be a writer.

    And writers write, even if they don’t feel like it.

    And so it goes for runners, yogis, meditators, athletes, crafstmen, lovers.

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