#24 Put your actions where your mouth is

ByLukas
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Here’s a useful insight from James Clear, author of Atomic Habits:

Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.

https://jamesclear.com/3-2-1/june-4-2020

Writing every day reaffirms my “I’m a writer” identity.

Sitting on the couch every day reaffirms my “I’m a couch potato” identity.

As a consequence: when you change your actions and your identity starts shifting to align with those actions.

And that’s how we get out of a rut.

(The opposite isn’t always true: changing your thoughts without changing your actions will rarely shift your identity. I can think of being a writer as much as I want, if I never put any words on paper, I’m not a writer. That’s one of the principle of cognitive dissonance: Actions overrule Thoughts.)

Here’s how to change your actions and your identity:

  1. First, you decide who you want to be (and what your new identity looks like).
    “I want to be a yogi: someone who regularly practices yoga and takes care of his mind and body.”
  2. Second you get clear on what that would look like in your daily life: which actions you’ll take that are different from the ones you’re taking right now.
    “Instead of watching TV before, my “yogi identity” would do a daily yoga session.
  3. Third, you gain enough leverage over yourself to go against your current habits, and take those different action for a prolonged period of time.
    This is where most resistance comes up, because my old “couch potato identity” is fighting my “yogi” identity — and through my past actions, the couch potato has received WAY more votes than the yogi.
    So you need perseverance at this stage. Remember, every time you take those new actions, you’re voting for your new identity and new habits are taking roots.
  4. At some point, you reach a tipping point productivity experts call “habit escape velocity“: you now have so much momentum that you’re out of the sphere of influence of your old habits, and your new habits (and new identity) can take root.

Which begs the question…

Where are you saying you want to be a certain way, but you’re voting for something else through your daily actions?

Lukas Van Vyve

Put your money (or your actions) where your mouth is.

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    #56 Action, traction, distraction

    ByLukas

    At any given time in your day, if you’re doing what you set out to do, whether it’s work, play, going for a walk, or taking a nap, you’re gaining traction. In other words, you’re taking action and are moving towards a goal you set… and you’re becoming more of the person you want to be.

    If you’re not doing what you set out to do, you’re getting distracted. You’re taking action and are moving away from the goal you set… and you’re becoming less of the person you want to be.

    Traction, distraction… it’s all action. The only difference: are your actions deliberate, and have you intentionally chosen who you want to be (and which actions align with that identity)?

    I can consciously set out, in advance to write for two hours a day, because I want to be a writer. Then, if I end up actually writing during those two hours, I’m gaining traction towards that goal and the person I want to be: a writer.

    I can also consciously set out, in advance, to watch a Netflix series afterward as a reward for my hard labor, because I want to be someone who also allows downtime and relaxation in my day.

    And if during that time I set out to watch that series, I actually watch the series, guess what: I’m gaining traction towards that goal and identity too! (BUT following this logic, if during the time I set aside for Netflix, I decide to keep writing, strangely enough, the writing has now become the distraction. This is how you become a workaholic.)

    If I set out to meet with friends, or have a romantic date night because I want to be someone who values friendships and relationships, and I follow through… yep, now I’m gaining traction in that domain too.

    The same goes for anything else I consciously decide to do on any given day.

    Choose for traction and let your actions be a vote for who you want to be.

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    #262 How to feel more fulfillment right now

    ByLukas

    Fulfillment doesn’t come from closing the gap between wanting and having.

    It comes from closing the gap between wanting and doing.

    Want to write a book? Then write every day – even if you don’t have the book yet.

    Want to start a successful business? Then start the business – even if you’re not successful yet.

    Want to run a marathon? Then run every day – even if you haven’t run a marathon yet.

    After all, you might never close the gap between wanting and having.

    But the gap between wanting and doing, you can close right this very moment.

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    #65 The Secret to Sticking to Your Habits

    ByLukas

    I don’t wake up every day in love with the prospect of writing a blog post.

    But I do love that part of my identity is that I publish something every day.

    By not publishing, I would lose that part of my identity and end up frustrated because I gave up something I enjoy. And that’s painful.

    So I write.

    The secret to sticking to your habits: make the pain of quitting bigger than the pain of getting over the resistance against doing what you know is good for you.

    Because the pain of discipline is always easier to bear than the pain of regret.

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