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    #24 Put your actions where your mouth is

    Here’s a useful insight from James Clear, author of Atomic Habits:

    Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.

    https://jamesclear.com/3-2-1/june-4-2020

    Writing every day reaffirms my “I’m a writer” identity.

    Sitting on the couch every day reaffirms my “I’m a couch potato” identity.

    As a consequence: when you change your actions and your identity starts shifting to align with those actions.

    And that’s how we get out of a rut.

    (The opposite isn’t always true: changing your thoughts without changing your actions will rarely shift your identity. I can think of being a writer as much as I want, if I never put any words on paper, I’m not a writer. That’s one of the principle of cognitive dissonance: Actions overrule Thoughts.)

    Here’s how to change your actions and your identity:

    1. First, you decide who you want to be (and what your new identity looks like).
      “I want to be a yogi: someone who regularly practices yoga and takes care of his mind and body.”
    2. Second you get clear on what that would look like in your daily life: which actions you’ll take that are different from the ones you’re taking right now.
      “Instead of watching TV before, my “yogi identity” would do a daily yoga session.
    3. Third, you gain enough leverage over yourself to go against your current habits, and take those different action for a prolonged period of time.
      This is where most resistance comes up, because my old “couch potato identity” is fighting my “yogi” identity — and through my past actions, the couch potato has received WAY more votes than the yogi.
      So you need perseverance at this stage. Remember, every time you take those new actions, you’re voting for your new identity and new habits are taking roots.
    4. At some point, you reach a tipping point productivity experts call “habit escape velocity“: you now have so much momentum that you’re out of the sphere of influence of your old habits, and your new habits (and new identity) can take root.

    Which begs the question…

    Where are you saying you want to be a certain way, but you’re voting for something else through your daily actions?

    Lukas Van Vyve

    Put your money (or your actions) where your mouth is.

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    #81 Am I willing?

    I can say I want to publish a new book.

    Double my income.

    Get in shape.

    Learn another language.

    But hidden beneath the surface of lofty goals are daily actions.

    Publishing a book… What does that really mean?

    Who is that person who has published the book? (Not just written… actually published?)

    What do they say to themselves?

    What do they think?

    What do they feel?

    What do they do every day? And what can I start doing every day to become more of that person who has written that book?

    Most importantly, am I willing to take those actions every day to reach whatever goal I’m after?

    Am I willing to change?

    If not, is that goal even important to me?

    Who do I choose to be?

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    #134 Losing makes you a loser – and that’s fine

    You can’t change the fact that winning makes you a winner and losing makes you a loser.

    But you CAN:

    • stop caring about winning and losing in the first place; or
    • change your definition of winning and losing so winning becomes easier, and losing harder.

    What if, instead of only winning when you beat your opponent, to you, winning means giving it your all and putting your heart on the line?

    What if, to you, winning doesn’t mean writing a bestselling book (which is out of your control anyway) but showing the discipline to write a book in the first place… a book that potentially could be a bestseller?

    What if, to you, losing doesn’t mean suffering a defeat but giving in to your fear and never starting in the first place?

    Make your own rules around winning and losing, and don’t make them too hard on yourself. It’s a simple and viable way to feel better every day.

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    #32 Before I learned not to listen

    Before I learned not to listen
    I would stand
    seemingly still
    but secretly swaying
    swallowed up by a willow tree
    and its play with the wind

    Before I learned not to listen
    I would hold my head against the rind
    reach
    reconnect with an old friend
    the way it has always felt best
    cheek pressed to chest

    Before I learned not to listen
    a breeze in the leaves
    rustling ruminating
    would sound like raindrops in my ears
    making my eyes answer
    with a torrent of tears

    Before I learned not to listen
    a rolling thunder
    thumping like a beating heart
    would rumble from my cheek to my ear
    replacing my fear
    with a memory I used to held dear
    we were never really apart

    Before I learned not to listen
    before the lust for language
    reduced what I could see
    and sense within
    I would allow the whispers of the wordless world
    speak to me like kin

    Before I learned not to listen
    I would accept
    that once upon a time
    I remembered your name
    and once upon a time we both knew
    we were one and all the same

    Lukas Van Vyve
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    #148 It’s not a choice

    When everyone starts using AI chatbots to write, but the insights inside your body and mind scream to be poured on the page – writing is not a choice.

    When everyone dreads yet another practice session, but you know running the same route for the millionth time is all it takes to make you feel alive – running is not a choice.

    When you’ve tripped over the same bar a thousand times, but you know the release of getting it right will energize you for days to come – playing the guitar is not a choice.


    When your big vision has been rejected over and over again, but you know you will not rest until you’ve brought your life-changing ideas to the world – being an entrepreneur is not a choice.

    When what drains others is your lifeblood, deep inside, you know life leaves you no other choice.

    Because life is all about passion.

    Passion is about a lifetime of practice.

    A lifetime of practice becomes your identity.

    And your identity is what makes you put your heart on the line.

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    #130 The perfect excuse

    Perfectionism is the perfect excuse for not showing up.

    If you don’t publish because you’re waiting for the perfect blog post, you’ll hide behind your desk forever – because there’ll always be something you can improve.

    If you don’t go for a walk because you’re waiting for the perfect weather, you’ll be stuck forever inside – because there’ll always be a day with more sunshine or a nicer breeze.

    If you wait to live the life you desire until you have the perfect age, amount of money, degree, or partner, you’ll wait until it’s too late to enjoy your life in the first place.

    If you know things will never be perfect anyway, and you’re not allowed to wait until they’re perfect, or even until they’re “good enough”…

    What could you start doing today? What have you been putting off?

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