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    #203 What makes your aspirations valuable

    An aspiring writer who doesn’t believe writing is a valuable skill in our current society and focuses on building a traditional career instead.

    An aspiring runner who doesn’t believe running is a good use of their time in our current society and goes out for drinks every night.

    An aspiring classical musician who doesn’t believe society will ever appreciate their art – and goes into pop music instead.


    If you want to turn aspirations into achievements, you’ll have to decide for yourself what’s valuable, even if it goes against what society and tradition prescribe.

    So to make writing a valuable skill, write.

    To make running a good use of your time, run.

    To make the world appreciate your classical music, practice classical music.

    To make anything worthwhile, show that it’s worth your while.

    Because going against the mainstream is not just necessary to achieve your aspirations – it’s what makes your aspirations valuable in the first place.

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    #63 Completion vs Consistency: True Life Projects

    Completion projects leads to restless rushing, an achievement, then a black hole. Indecision.

    I got the promotion. I wrote the book. I finished the degree. I built the house. I sold the business. Now who am I… and what’s next?

    Consistency projects lead to a change in habits and identity. Every day, I do what I believe to be true to who I am. As a result, every day, I’m becoming who I truly want to be.

    Consistency projects are true life projects, because they’re about taking daily actions and installing habits, never-ending until they come to their natural conclusion.

    I’ll write every day without ever thinking I’m writing my last words. Now I’m a writer… until one day, I feel: the season of writing is over.

    You’ll tend to gardens, plants, and trees every day without ever thinking this is the last flower you’ll hold in your hand… until one day, you feel: the season of tree-tending is over.

    We take care of our children from the moment they’re born, without thinking about letting them go. Now we’re caretakers… until one day, we feel: the season of caretaking is over.

    We’ll breathe every day, without ever thinking about breathing our last breath. Now we’re breathers… until one day, we feel: the season of breathing is over.

    Lukas Van Vyve
  • #27 Appreciating the meaningless melody of a foreign language

    Learning a foreign language is both a frustrating and liberating experience.

    We can focus on the frustration of not understanding the words the way we understand our mother tongue. Or we can realize that without the words, we are free to fall back on other ways of capturing and understanding meaning.

    A crying baby can be soothed by words it does not yet understand, because she senses what’s behind the sounds, lets the meaningless melody cradle her to sleep…

    Similarly, we don’t always have to know what’s behind the words, as long as we make an effort to understand the meaning behind the sounds.

    Hearing a foreign language brings us back to that wordless world the way we experienced it as a newborn, before we tried so hard to put everything within and around us into language.

    It makes us remember, there’s more to life than our words will ever allow us to express. And somehow, that’s a soothing thought.

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    #218 The United States of “If I wanted, I could”

    The path toward self-awareness isn’t always pleasant. 

    Take yesterday, when I realized that in many cases, I’m more interested in the comfort of “wanting” something I don’t have than in “taking action to get something.”

    That unappealing realization triggered a cascade of even more unappealing questions.

    Would I rather mess around with small blog posts instead of becoming a skilled writer crafting coherent arguments?

    Would I rather learn about a million different strategies to grow a newsletter instead of actually spreading the word and getting more people to read my newsletter?

    Would I rather learn how to learn a language than actually learn a new language?

    Is the frustration of unrealized potential also a huge source of comfort in my life?


    I’m not sure if I should be happy with that realization. 

    Maybe realizations aren’t even supposed to make me happy.

    But even if they were, it doesn’t matter. 

    Because look: here I am, writing another insight about it.

    Another Tiny Trust Builder, proving that every day, I am one step closer to renouncing my citizenship of the United States of “If I wanted, I could.”

    Another reminder to myself and you, my friend, one I’ll repeat until the bitter end: actions overrule thoughts.

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    #43 Quick-Start Guide to Stream of Consciousness Journaling (Morning Pages)

    On 1. January 2021, I started writing 3 pages of stream-of-consciousness journaling a day. I haven’t missed a day since. That’s 663 days in a row: an inner dialogues of 1989 pages poured in to piles of journals.

    Stream-of-consciousness journaling is also often called Morning Pages (a term coined by Julia Cameron in her book “The Artist’s Way“).

    The idea is that you wake up in the morning and before you do anything else, take a journal and pen, and you start externalizing the voice talking to yourself in your head on the page.

    You don’t stop to think about perfect phrasing (your inner voice never stops talking, either). In fact, you don’t lift your pen off the paper at all until you’ve filled 3 pages.

    Shopping lists, to-dos, dreams, interactions, worries, fears, excitement, goals, friends, family, memories, ideas, goals,… whatever’s on your mind.

    No poetry, no perfect prose, no structured sentences, no coherent insights – unless that’s what flows out of you.

    No judgment either. You never even have to read this back.

    Nothing but pure, unfiltered stream of consciousness.

    This simple practice has transformed me.

    Why write Morning Pages?

    • The feeling of liberation once you’re able to relax your mind and channel your stream of consciousness. Like an athlete “in the zone”, your mind becomes one with the pen in your hand, and words flow from your head and heart onto the paper. Once you get it, writing 3 pages becomes easy – after all, your inner voice never shuts up.
    • Intentionality. When I write them by hand, it seems to slow me down just enough to get in the zone, calm my racing thoughts and think more slowly and deliberately.
    • Creative breakthroughs. You start by writing down everything on your mind in an unfiltered way, free of judgment and stress. Then, you start “sculpting away, day by day.
    • Externalizing thought patterns, loops, destructive self-talk. Once they’re on the page, it’s hard to ignore the way you speak to yourself.
    • Recognize recurring patterns and topics that come back over and over again.

    Tips for success:

    • Write 3 pages today. Not more, not less. But do it today. Cut yourself off when you reach 3 pages. Today. Repeat tomorrow.
    • Don’t read your notes back. Don’t show them to anyone. You want this to be pure, raw, unfiltered stream of consciousness. This is not publication material, this is a representation of your messy internal dialogue.
    • If you have a creative breakthrough or interesting idea while writing your Morning Pages, keep writing until the 3 pages are full; then make a separate note about the idea or insight you had.
    • See it as a huge unpolished pile of thoughts with interesting connections; then use that to uncover interesting connections, good ideas that you can further develop. Good ideas and insights will be buried in a sea of fluff – and that’s fine. Volume matters. (again, sculpting away, day by day)
    • Julia Cameron suggests writing your Morning Pages right after you get out of bed – before your ego wakes up.

    Or don’t do any of the above and just write.

    Write first thing tomorrow morning.

    Don’t overthink it, just write.

    Don’t read it back, just write.

    Don’t worry about grammar, just write.

    Then when you’re done, write some more.

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