#207 Overgeneralization vs Undergeneralization

ByLukas
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Overgeneralization: I failed to stick to a new habit once, so I’ll always give up.

Undergeneralization: Even though I’ve been writing consistently for months, I’m still expecting the day I’ll finally give up again.

Both are manifestations of self-sabotage and perpetuations of a negative self-image.

The only way out: don’t focus on habits, focus on Tiny Trust Builders.

Let your actions be a vote for who you want to be.

Let your actions overrule your thoughts.

Let your actions change your identity.

One day at a time.

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  • #33 There’s power in publishing imperfect work.

    ByLukas

    656 days ago, I started writing 3 pages of stream-of-consciousness journaling a day.

    That’s an inner dialogue of 1968 pages poured into piles of journals now safely stuffed away.

    30 days ago, some of those thoughts started making their way to my blog.

    I promised myself that if I made it to 30 daily posts in a row, I would start sharing them.

    Today is the day, so here goes.

    I’m sharing daily observations about language, language learning, memory, creativity, habits, discipline, the art of learning, tools for thought.

    Lessons I’ve learned.
    Insights I’ve earned.

    Words I’ve heard.
    Memories spurred.

    Books I’ve read.
    Poems flowing out of my heart and head.

    No rules, no fixed topic, no niche, no marketing strategy.
    Nothing but whatever’s on my mind.

    I’ve learned a lot so far, but the most important insight: there’s power in publishing imperfect work.

    Because if I allow myself to create something imperfect every day, I’m certain that someday the sum of all these imperfect creations will be something I’m proud of.

    It’s liberating.

    Maybe there’s liberating power in reading someone else’s imperfect work too.

    I can’t wait to find out together with you.

    If you like what you see, sign up for the newsletter 🙂

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    #148 It’s not a choice

    ByLukas

    When everyone starts using AI chatbots to write, but the insights inside your body and mind scream to be poured on the page – writing is not a choice.

    When everyone dreads yet another practice session, but you know running the same route for the millionth time is all it takes to make you feel alive – running is not a choice.

    When you’ve tripped over the same bar a thousand times, but you know the release of getting it right will energize you for days to come – playing the guitar is not a choice.

    When your big vision has been rejected over and over again, but you know you will not rest until you’ve brought your life-changing ideas to the world – being an entrepreneur is not a choice.

    When what drains others is your lifeblood, deep inside, you know life leaves you no other choice.

    Because life is all about passion.

    Passion is about a lifetime of practice.

    A lifetime of practice becomes your identity.

    And your identity is what makes you put your heart on the line.

  • | | |

    #73 Why am I rushing?

    ByLukas

    Journaling question of the day: Why am I rushing?

    Out of habit and automaticity – mindlessness caused by endless repetition?

    Out of discomfort – I want to get out of this situation as soon as possible?

    Out of impatience – I expect whatever comes next to be more interesting or riveting?

    What would happen if I don’t rush this?

    By interrupting the automaticity and slowing down, will I reopen my senses and discover new nuances?

    By not rushing away from discomfort, will I discover everything is not as bad as I feared it would be?

    By resisting impatience, can I become fascinated with whatever is happening right here, right now?

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    #104 This is not a poker game

    ByLukas

    All in on getting fluent in a foreign language?
    That’s a 6-12 month game, at the minimum.

    All in on learning an instrument?
    Count on a multi-year (or multi-decade) game.

    All-in on getting in shape?
    That’s a life-long game.

    This is not a poker game. You’re not trying to impress anyone. There are no opponents to deter. Not everything hinges on one big moment where you can win or lose it all.

    You’re not only all in the moment you decide you’re all-in. You’re all in for the entire journey. That means: making your efforts, resources, and motivation last.

    All in means preparing for the long game.

    Choosing small daily habits over grand gestures.

    Choosing consistency over completion.

    Accepting that whatever you go all in on will inevitably change your identity.

    Now you’re all in on life, and who you aspire to be.

  • |

    #29 The myth of self-sabotage

    ByLukas

    All behavior is inspired by avoiding pain or gaining pleasure – and since you usually act on what your brain perceives as the most intense of the two.

    So if you think you desire something, but then “sabotage” yourself so you never get what you desire, that means you have mixed feelings about desire (and thus inner conflict): deep down, you feel that desire will give you more pain than pleasure.

    In other words, it’s not self-sabotage: it’s your brain protecting you from pain it perceives as stronger than the pleasure you might get from reaching your goal.

    Maybe you desire more money, but deep down, you feel money will corrupt you, or make you lose friends, make you feel guilty, or make you lose your drive.

    Maybe you have a desire to write or create, but you feel the pain of judgment or rejection is stronger than the pleasure of creating.

    Maybe you want to get in shape, but deep down, you feel you’ll give up anyway before reaching any meaningful results, so you’d rather save yourself the pain of future disappointment (a classic self-trust problem).

    Maybe you notice a certain destructive pattern in your relationships, but you believe going to therapy and “opening up that can of worms” will be even worse than perpetuating the current situation.

    If you keep sabotaging yourself, it might be worth to ask yourself the question: what pain am I avoiding? What am I afraid of? In my imagination, what’s going to happen when I reach my goal; both positive AND negative?

    Or even better than just asking: journal about it.

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