#257 Not pleasant, but predictable

No one is bad at sticking to habits.

Because everyone’s day-to-day life is stitched together with recurring activities anyway, whether you consciously choose to do them or not.

Maybe you brush your teeth every day – and that has become a non-negotiable.

Maybe you wash your hands before every meal – and that has become a non-negotiable.

Maybe you shower every morning right after waking up – and that has become a non-negotiable.

Maybe you write every day – and that has become a non-negotiable.

Maybe you practice yoga three times a week – and that has become a non-negotiable.

Maybe you spend 10 minutes daily catching up with family, friends, acquaintances, or relatives you haven’t seen in a while – and that has become a non-negotiable.

Habits are habits.

And that has an interesting consequence:

If you can do that, you can also do this.

You feel bad because you don’t write.

And when you write, you feel bad because you’re scared of the inevitable day you stop writing.

That’s how you create a self-improvement prison.

And that prison has only one way out.

Intend to do what’s good for you.

Then realize that even if you don’t live up to that standard all the time, you’re still worthy of self-love and self-trust.

Focus on intention, not outcome.

Focus on cultivating elastic discipline rather than on becoming a habit hardliner.

Focus on the general direction of your life, not a day-by-day judgment of your every action.

Maintain a majority vote for who you want to be.

Realize you’re not going to be perfect today – and being perfect isn’t the goal anyway.

I can say I want to run a marathon, write a book, or have a successful career – which doesn’t mean I’ll actually end up running a marathon, writing a book, or having a successful career.

But if I’m serious about it, it does mean I’ll take daily steps towards that goal – daily actions that will change my identity.

Can I live with the present-day implications of my uncertain future visions?

If I don’t know yet if I’ll ever write the book – will these daily actions still be fulfilling to me?

Will they make me happier?

Will I be happy with the person I become by taking such daily actions?

Do these daily actions contribute to a fulfilling emotional, mental, physical, and social life?

If not, am I willing to make emotional, mental, physical, or social sacrifices?

This is a choice everyone makes for themselves.

But I don’t want to make my present day miserable for an uncertain vision of the future I don’t even know will happen.

Most people don’t see why you’re taking time out of your busy day to sit down and write until the book you were working on every day lies in front of them.

They don’t see why you run every day and eat clean until you set a personal best at the next marathon.

They don’t see the new product you’re working on until it’s developed so far that it helps them achieve their goals.

You’re the only one who sees the method to your madness.

And that’s fine.

Because you probably don’t see the method to their madness either.