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    #38 Regret, worry, forget

    We regret the past, worry about the future, and forget about the now.

    What if I:

    • learn from and let go of the past
    • create an empowering vision of the future, informed by your imagination AND lessons of the past
    • act in the now, confident that every action you take brings you closer towards that vision

    To let go of the past:

    • Write Morning Pages – Stream of Consciousness journaling
    • Did I give it my all? Whether my actions were aligned or misguided, did I go for it 100%?
    • Did I allow myself to learn something and see the silver lining?

    To create a future with fewer worries:

    To be in the moment:

    • Write Morning Pages – Stream of Consciousness journaling
    • Breathe
    • Walk in nature
    • Create something
    • Talk… and listen

    The constant: write Morning Pages.

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    #43 Quick-Start Guide to Stream of Consciousness Journaling (Morning Pages)

    On 1. January 2021, I started writing 3 pages of stream-of-consciousness journaling a day. I haven’t missed a day since. That’s 663 days in a row: an inner dialogues of 1989 pages poured in to piles of journals.

    Stream-of-consciousness journaling is also often called Morning Pages (a term coined by Julia Cameron in her book “The Artist’s Way“).

    The idea is that you wake up in the morning and before you do anything else, take a journal and pen, and you start externalizing the voice talking to yourself in your head on the page.

    You don’t stop to think about perfect phrasing (your inner voice never stops talking, either). In fact, you don’t lift your pen off the paper at all until you’ve filled 3 pages.

    Shopping lists, to-dos, dreams, interactions, worries, fears, excitement, goals, friends, family, memories, ideas, goals,… whatever’s on your mind.

    No poetry, no perfect prose, no structured sentences, no coherent insights – unless that’s what flows out of you.

    No judgment either. You never even have to read this back.

    Nothing but pure, unfiltered stream of consciousness.

    This simple practice has transformed me.

    Why write Morning Pages?

    • The feeling of liberation once you’re able to relax your mind and channel your stream of consciousness. Like an athlete “in the zone”, your mind becomes one with the pen in your hand, and words flow from your head and heart onto the paper. Once you get it, writing 3 pages becomes easy – after all, your inner voice never shuts up.
    • Intentionality. When I write them by hand, it seems to slow me down just enough to get in the zone, calm my racing thoughts and think more slowly and deliberately.
    • Creative breakthroughs. You start by writing down everything on your mind in an unfiltered way, free of judgment and stress. Then, you start “sculpting away, day by day.
    • Externalizing thought patterns, loops, destructive self-talk. Once they’re on the page, it’s hard to ignore the way you speak to yourself.
    • Recognize recurring patterns and topics that come back over and over again.

    Tips for success:

    • Write 3 pages today. Not more, not less. But do it today. Cut yourself off when you reach 3 pages. Today. Repeat tomorrow.
    • Don’t read your notes back. Don’t show them to anyone. You want this to be pure, raw, unfiltered stream of consciousness. This is not publication material, this is a representation of your messy internal dialogue.
    • If you have a creative breakthrough or interesting idea while writing your Morning Pages, keep writing until the 3 pages are full; then make a separate note about the idea or insight you had.
    • See it as a huge unpolished pile of thoughts with interesting connections; then use that to uncover interesting connections, good ideas that you can further develop. Good ideas and insights will be buried in a sea of fluff – and that’s fine. Volume matters. (again, sculpting away, day by day)
    • Julia Cameron suggests writing your Morning Pages right after you get out of bed – before your ego wakes up.

    Or don’t do any of the above and just write.

    Write first thing tomorrow morning.

    Don’t overthink it, just write.

    Don’t read it back, just write.

    Don’t worry about grammar, just write.

    Then when you’re done, write some more.

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    #73 Why am I rushing?

    Journaling question of the day: Why am I rushing?

    Out of habit and automaticity – mindlessness caused by endless repetition?

    Out of discomfort – I want to get out of this situation as soon as possible?

    Out of impatience – I expect whatever comes next to be more interesting or riveting?

    What would happen if I don’t rush this?

    By interrupting the automaticity and slowing down, will I reopen my senses and discover new nuances?

    By not rushing away from discomfort, will I discover everything is not as bad as I feared it would be?

    By resisting impatience, can I become fascinated with whatever is happening right here, right now?

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    How Replacing Productivity by Traction Leads to a More Fulfilled, Creative Life (the Productivity Trap)

    Many of the articles on this website touch on the concept of productivity. And yet, I have very mixed feelings about the word. There’s something aspirational about it, and at the same time… it feels dirty.

    Whenever a word triggers me like that, I like to do do an exercise to figure out what’s causing it. First, I write down all my instant associations with the word, without thinking too much. (For example “productivity is…” or “productivity means…”. No thinking allowed, just instant writing.)

    Then I look for patterns or insights in what I wrote.

    (This is a fascinating exercise. I suggest you try it with “rich people are…” and see which instant associations bubble up. It might not be pretty.)

    As always, the instant association exercise did its job. In this post, you’ll read what it brought to light, how I managed to reframe productivity as traction, and how that reframe might help you live a more creative and more fulfilled life, too.

    The Productivity Trap: Does productivity mean maximizing economic output?

    The instant association exercise revealed that my biggest problem with productivity is that I (and many others) often mix it up with “economic productivity.” In other words: maximizing economic output every day. Or less euphemistic: working 10-12 hours a day.

    What about “producing a lot in as little time as possible?” At first sight, that looks like a good thing, right?

    But here, too, there’s a lot of pressure to maximize output without regard for rest and recovery.

    For example, let’s say you’re a master of deep work, and you finish a job that is supposed to take 8 hours in 4 hours.

    For many people, that means “Great, now I have 4 more hours left to do something productive“. And they end up working 8 hours anyway. Or 10 (better do something “productive” at night than watching TV for 2 hours!)

    This is a typical productivity trap. It’s a monster that’s never satisfied, creates a lot of pressure and leads to burnout.

    A healthier way to achieve a lot

    Luckily, there are other and healthier ways to be focused and achieve a lot. I like how Nir Eyal frames it in his excellent book “Indistractable“:

    On any given day, your mission is to do the things you set out to do.

    Sounds simple, but it’s a massive mindset shift.

    To understand why, we need to take a look at the concepts of traction and distraction.

    The magic of traction and distraction

    At any given time in your day, if you’re doing what you set out to do, no matter if it’s work, play, going for a walk, or taking a nap, you’re gaining traction. In other words, you’re moving towards the goal you set.

    If you’re not doing what you set out to do, you’re getting distracted. You’re moving away from the goal you set.

    Simple, right?

    The only prerequisite is that you choose what you want to gain traction towards. You have to deliberately decide what you’re going to do, create, work on, or play with.

    Traction is inclusive of ALL your daily activities, work or not

    The nicest part about this approach to “productivity” is that it allows, includes, and even encourages what many people classify as as “non-productive downtime.”

    For example, you can consciously decide to write two hours a day. Then, if you end up actually writing during those two hours, you’re gaining traction towards that goal.

    But you can also consciously decide, in advance, to watch a 1-hour series afterward as a reward for your hard labor.

    And if during that time you set out to watch that series, you actually watch the series, guess what: you’re gaining traction towards that goal too!

    If you set out to meet with friends, or have a romantic date night… and you follow through… yep, now you’re gaining traction in that domain too.

    The same goes for spending time with your kids, and anything else you consciously decide to do in any given day.

    If you adopt this new traction mindset, everything I described has now become “productivity”.

    Traction increases integrity, self-trust and self-esteem

    Now, why is this important?

    Simple. if you consciously choose what you’re going to do, no matter if it’s work, play, relaxing,… and you then follow through…

    That shows integrity.

    You show yourself you can do what you set out to do. You keep your promises to yourself.

    And that increases your self-trust and self-esteem.

    That’s right: saying you’re going to watch an episode of your favorite series and then doing that (without feeling guilty) can increase your self-trust as much as saying you’re writing a blog post and following through!

    That might sound weird, but that’s how it works. It’s just a healthier way to look at your daily activities.

    Added benefit: the more self-trust and self-esteem, the less inner resistance you’ll feel to living the life you want to life. Read more about that here.

    2 Essential conditions to make Traction work

    Here’s what’s important to start taking advantage of the power of traction:

    • Consciously decide what you’re going to do on any given day: work, play everything. If you don’t, the habits you created unconsciously over the past years will take over and pull you toward activities you want to avoid.
    • Avoid overpromising things you’re going to accomplish in one day. If you overpromise and it’s impossible to fulfill that promise to yourself (or others), you lower your self-esteem. If you do this every day, you’ll end up losing all trust in yourself. You’ll develop a belief that you’re unproductive, lazy, not reliable. In reality, you’re making unrealistic promises to yourself.

    A better way to manage projects without overpromising: timeboxing

    With practice, you’ll get better at estimating the time needed to complete a project you can create a realistic calendar.

    But sometimes, it’s hard to predict how long a project will take.

    If that’s the case, I recommend “time boxing”: adding a set block of time to your calendar to work on a project.

    Once the time is up, you stop working on that project.

    It doesn’t matter how much you achieved. As long as you worked on the project during that time block, you’ve gained traction. (If you ended up doing something else or you got distracted halfway through, that’s a different story.)

    In the end, it’s all about being honest with yourself and finding uninterrupted blocks of time to work.

    Step-by-step plan to start gaining traction

    Here’s how I recommend you get started with traction, without overdoing it (remember, keeping your promises to yourself and your integrity is vital):

    1. Decide on 1-2 projects you want to spend your time on a given day (work, play, relaxing, friends,… anything)
    2. Find uninterrupted time in your calendar where you can do that thing. 15 minutes, 30 minutes, 60 minutes… find what works in your current situation.
    3. Add it to your calendar. Make sure to think through any possible distractions that might come up (your phone, kids, meetings,…) and prevent them from pulling on your attention during your chosen time block.
    4. When the time comes, work on the project you set out to do.
    5. When time’s up, stop working, no matter how much you did.
    6. Afterwards, review. How did it go?
      Did you do what you set out to do? Did you get distracted by anything? Could you prevent these distractions from happening in the future? You might have to change your environment. Put away your phone. Choose a different time with fewer distractions.
      Did you overpromise to yourself? Were your expectations for what you could achieve in this time block unrealistic? Was the time block was too short or too long? If necessary, adapt the time blocks and lower your expectations for the next time to avoid disappointing yourself again…
      Keep in mind: repeatedly letting yourself down is bad for your integrity and self-esteem.
    7. The next day, plan another uninterrupted block of time, this time adapted based on your experiences with the first block.
    8. Keep trying and adapting.

    Practicing traction this way will help your self-esteem, integrity, your trust in yourself. You’ll also get more done in less time. Because this is a plan that works long-term. It builds discipline. It helps you create a life you like and feel good about in the long term.

    Final thoughts: replace the word, not the meaning.

    Whenever a word becomes cluttered with negative connotations, I give myself two choices.

    Either I train myself to redefine the meaning of the word and replace the negative connotation with something more positive. That’s the hard way.

    Here’s the easy way: I replace the word itself with a brand-new concept with no negative associations.

    Productivity becomes traction.

    Controlling becomes channeling. (Blog post coming soon).

    Failure becomes lesson.

    You get the idea.

    I suggest you take the easy way and replace your goal of productivity with traction.

    It’ll save you a lot of time and frustration.

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    #57 Fill in the blank

    Most of your daily actions are guided by unconscious patterns and habits. But since actions overrule thoughts, even unconscious actions contribute to how you see yourself.

    The more conscious actions you take, the more of a say you get in who you are (or want to be).

    I choose to do ………… because I choose to be someone who …………

    I choose not to do ………… because I choose to perpetuate my identity of ………….

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    #41 Unaligned agendas

    Benefit and harm all depend on your perspective. The futurist John Smart suggests looking at phenomena, trends, and events through four different lenses (the “Foresight Tetrad“):

    • Personal
    • Organizational (=collective)
    • Global
    • Universal

    Every level has its own agenda, but their interests are rarely fully aligned.

    For example: for evolution and natural selection to work, a life form must have a reasonably short lifespan, reproduce quickly, and most importantly, not clone their DNA perfectly. Because small genetic reproduction errors help a species evolve and become better adapted to our environment.

    Sn an organizational/collective level (taking all of humanity together) those genetic errors are a good thing. In fact, without them, human beings in our current brain, with our current intelligence, wouldn’t even exist. Not at a species level, and not at an individual level.

    But to stumble upon a couple of beneficial “genetic errors”, evolution also needs tons of harmful genetic errors.

    That means that every newborn runs the risk of genetic errors that can cause medical conditions, pain, and suffering – on an individual level.

    We suffer individually to evolve collectively.

    Another example: in our quest to improve the condition of humanity as a whole (at the organizational/collective level), we’re harming other species and change the climate (at a global level).

    Ignoring the principles the universe and the earth as an ecosystem might well lead to collapse of that ecosystem – and result in the collapse of humanity.

    The universe has an agenda.
    Natural selection has an agenda.
    The global earth has an agenda.
    Humanity as a whole has an agenda.
    Individuals have an agenda.

    We can’t afford to ignore any.

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