#14 Meeting myself where I am

ByLukas

When writing, the most hurtful words enter your head when no words leave your pen.

A blank page is a mirror of our own insecurities, frightening, judgmental…

I found the only way to get through is meeting myself where I am.

Inspired, afraid, angry, frustrated, fearful of poor work, poor words, or no words at all…

This is where the journey starts.

The moment I accept that, I am free again.

This is why I love Stream-Of-Consciousness writing. Whatever state I am in, I transfer the stream of thoughts, the inner dialogue to the page, and see where the flow takes me.

Here’s what I’ve learned: it always takes me somewhere.

And that’s enough to get started.

Because a blank page is also a promise of all my creative potential, waiting to materialize.

And when the words finally emerge
everything flows
and my self-trust grows.

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    #59 Entity Mindset vs Incremental Mindset

    ByLukas

    Do you believe you’re good at something solely because of talent, invalidating all the work you’re putting in?

    Or do you believe you can change the course of your life, and let your daily actions shape who you are?

    The American psychologist and author of the book “Mindset” Carol Dweck describes how the way you think about your abilities can make or break your success in life:

    • Entity (fixed) mindset: “I’m good at languages, I’m bad at math”
    • Incremental (growth) mindset: “I worked hard on this, I’m learning, I’m discovering how to do this”

    An entity mindset makes you run into a wall

    When things get tough, people with an entity mindset often give up, because they don’t truly believe they can get much better.

    After all,I if you believe it’s all about innate ability, then why make any effort to develop strengths or weaknesses?

    An entity mindset also leads to fear of failure and perfectionism. If you’re believed to have an innate, fixed talent that’s set in stone, you’ll constantly need to live up to an unreasonably high standard for that particular talent.

    An incremental mindset makes you thrive

    People with an incremental mindset, on the other hand, thrive in tough situations: they know that through perseverance and a focus on daily practice and perseverance they can develop their skills and talents.

    Even if predisposition plays an important role, switching to an incremental mindset will always make you feel better about yourself and your daily actions.

    And while education and childhood experiences have a large impact on your mindset – you can always change your mind – by changing your actions.

  • #331 Building habits the lazy way

    ByLukas

    Some people think they can’t build habits because they’re lazy.

    Maybe we all are – so we might as well make laziness the key to building habits.

    I write only one short daily post because I know I won’t stick to writing long-form posts – and when I feel like writing long-form, it doesn’t feel like an obligation but a treat. Laziness built the writing habit, and laziness makes me feel good when I write more.

    I do 5-minute daily meditations because I know I won’t stick to 30-minute meditation as a habit – yet when I DO meditate for 30 minutes, it feels like a treat. Laziness built the meditation habit, and laziness makes me feel good when I meditate more.

    If you are so sure you won’t stick to anything overly ambitious, what’s the laziest way you could implement a behavior change? Can you use that as your starting point to build life-changing habits?

  • #167 Worry or dream a thousand times

    ByLukas

    I can worry a thousand times until my worries come true.

    I can envision my dreams a thousand times until my dreams come true.

    Not because of the act of worrying or the dreaming itself.

    But because my worries or dreams will incite different present actions taking me down different paths.

    Whatever future I focus on a thousand times, I’ll be drawn towards.

    Choose wisely.

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    #35 Why time speeds up and the world become blurry

    ByLukas

    The first hour after I was born, 60 minutes encapsulated my entire life outside the womb.

    An hour is an eternity.

    When I celebrated my first trip around the sun, one year encapsulated my entire life outside the womb.

    An hour is not that long anymore. But a year… that’s an eternity.

    When I’ll celebrate my 30th birthday next year, one year encapsulates about 1/30th of my experience in this body here on earth.

    A year is not that long anymore. But 30 years… that’s an eternity.

    Lukas Van Vyve

    There’s an absolute, immutable version of time, and then there’s our felt interpretation, which speeds up with every passing moment because we compare it to all the “time we’ve lived so far”.

    Maybe that’s why the older we get, the more effort it takes to stay in the present moment?

    Because, unlike a newborn child, for whom, compared to its short lifespan, an hour is an eternity, and every second is an opportunity to discover, drink in the world, explore…

    We’ve lived so many hours, minutes, and seconds that we don’t care anymore.

    with every passing year
    i’m more in a hurry
    and the days, minutes, seconds
    become ever more blurry

    i can live fast and miss out
    or slow down
    listen, look around
    be here, right now
    let the world whisper loud
    what life is all about

    and at last
    i hear you again.

    Lukas Van Vyve

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