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    #92 The true purpose of memory

    Memory isn’t an objective account of the past – and that’s not its purpose either.

    Memory stores the lessons we extract from life experience. And to do so, it modifies, adds, subtracts, highlights, and hides.

    Hot soup burns my tongue – next time, I’ll remember the pain, but not if it was tomato soup or chicken soup. And I’ll remember to wait a couple of minutes before having the first spoon.

    Experience lived. Irrelevant info deleted. Lesson learned. Memory created.

    My country gets invaded – and that causes so much pain, I won’t just deliver an objective account of what happened: I’ll make sure to tell everyone who the evil guys are too.

    Experience lived. Story modified. Lesson learned. Memory created.

    I eat the most delicious dessert at a Mexico City restaurant – that’s the memory I’m going to tell my friends about, not which glass of dessert wine I had with it.

    Experience lived. Dessert highlighted. Lesson learned. Memory created.

    You’re going to make memories anyway. Which lessons do you want to learn?

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    #135 Violence in a flower garden

    It’s easy to be non-violent when you’re in a flower garden

    Josh Waitzkin – The art of learning

    It’s easy to be kind to others when the world has always been kind to you.

    It’s easy to say you want to be a writer when you never really put yourself out there to prove it.


    To learn writing, I must confront the uncomfortable parts of writing – and learn not to respond by running away from it.

    To learn non-violence, I must confront violence – and learn not to respond with violence in return.

    To learn kindness, I must confront being hurt – and learn not to use that as an excuse to perpetuate the cycle of hurt.


    To build trust in myself, I must stay true to my values under difficult conditions.

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    #11 fixing a flawed faux finish

    when the cracks in my faux finish
    finally appear
    my mind screams out
    you’re coming too near

    yet i resist the need to hide
    lean in to the fear
    let the cracks grow wide
    because after all these years
    slowly steadily submerged under layers of snow
    frozen frightened i don’t know where else to go

    i feel i’m sliding back into my head
    but you don’t let me
    instead
    you keep me here
    make even more light appear
    look at the fear
    until the icy flawed frozen faux finish finally fully melts away
    into a trembling torrent of tears

    and through the sobs
    subtle shining light teardrops
    mix mingle mend my mind
    my heart my soul a warmth so kind

    you guide my gaze and through the tears
    in my eyes a rainbow appears
    eclipsing the fear
    making it clear
    that when I dare to feel complete
    allow your heart and mine to meet

    i finally remember
    that I’m enough
    i’ve always been

    and at last
    i can be seen

    Lukas Van Vyve
  • #378 Don’t negotiate yourself out of your dreams

    You usually make a plan in a moment of motivation and clear thinking, where everything seems possible.

    But you’ll have to execute the plan in a variety of situations, including harsh conditions.

    Remember this: difficult moments pass, just like easy moments.

    Every moment passes, but your plans and dreams will still be there.

    Don’t negotiate yourself out of your dreams based on a difficult moment.

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