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    #101 It’s all about the actions

    Achieving an outcome without the daily actions that lead to an identity shift is empty and unsustainable.

    I may want to publish a book. But if someone writes the whole book without my input and I put my name on it in the end, do I deserve to call it my book?

    I have a book. But I’m not a writer. And I’m not an author.

    I may want to have a million dollars. But if tomorrow I win the lottery or receive a large inheritance without any action from my side, what does that mean?

    I have a million dollars. But I’m not wealthy – and research suggests that without proper guidance, I’ll spend it all, ending up back at square one.

    It works the other way around, too. You can blindly chase an outcome (or slip into bad habits) without considering how the actions you need to take to get there will change you as a person.

    Depending on your actions to get there, chasing fame can make you happy – or very unhappy. Writing a book can make you happy or very unhappy. Building a hugely successful company can make you happy or very unhappy.

    The value, satisfaction, and resentment are all in the actions, not the outcome.

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    #220 A reminder to decide

    I could decide that writing less than 1000 words a day would be a failure – and I would be correct.

    I could decide that writing more than 50 words a day would be a failure – and I would be correct.

    I could decide that not writing today would be failure – and I would be correct.

    After all, for many things in life, you get to decide yourself what’s failure and what’s success.

    In fact, my friend, just like me you may have already decided for yourself what’s failure and what’s success.

    And just like me, you may need a reminder of that decision once in a while, so you can verify if it still serves you.

    This is that reminder.

    Which serves me well, because my decision was that writing you this short daily letter is exactly right.

    See you tomorrow.

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    #106 Pick your freedom battles

    Most people don’t really want the freedom to do anything they want, in other words, a life without constraints.

    They want the freedom to set their own constraints.

    To decide, “I want to spend my time writing,” instead of saying, “I am supposed to become a lawyer because that’s what we do in this family.”

    To decide, “I don’t drink alcohol,” instead of saying, “My social circle forces me to have a glass when I’m out.”

    To decide, “I want to live in that house, drive that car, and go on that exotic holiday, and I’m going to make it happen,” instead of saying, “I’m constrained by my talent, potential, current job, or where I grew up.”

    To decide, “I have time to learn a new language because it’s important to me,” instead of saying, “I’m too busy, I can’t (or don’t deserve to) do anything nice for myself.”

    Good or bad, beneficial or misguided, constraints are always there.

    Because life constantly forces you to make decisions, and every decision leads to a new constraint.

    Since it’s challenging to be aware of your decisions and their long-term constraining effects, which constraints do you consider important enough to set consciously (and spend considerable time and effort doing so)?

    Where do you allow others to dictate the constraints you live within?

    Who do you allow to dictate the constraints you live within?

    Pick your freedom battles.

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    #53 The flow of skill- and habit-building

    First, build trust in your good intentions. In other words: take actions that are “votes for the person you want to be“.

    Then, build trust in your ability to persevere. In other words: build a habit.

    Only then, you start building trust in your ability to constantly improve and become good (or excellent). In other words: build skill.

    Building the habit is the hard part – even more so if you simultaneously try to “be good at what you do”. Once your reach habit escape velocity and the habit is in place, building skill becomes way easier.

    Another reason why there’s power in publishing imperfect work.


    First I become good at writing every day.
    Then I become good at writing.

    First I become good at playing the guitar every day.
    Then I become good at playing the guitar.

    First I become good at doing yoga every day.
    Then I become good at yoga.

    First I become good at meditating every day.
    Then I become good at meditating.

    Lukas Van Vyve

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