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    #232 You’ll know when it’s time

    First, you write. Then you become a writer.

    First, you run. Then you become a runner.

    First, you set boundaries. Then you become good at setting boundaries.


    But before all that comes the decision to write. To run. To set boundaries.

    Because you’re dissatisfied with the past and say never again.

    Because you’re filled with excitement about a future vision.

    Because you know you’re ready to make the change.

    You’ll know when it’s time, my friend.

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    #106 Pick your freedom battles

    Most people don’t really want the freedom to do anything they want, in other words, a life without constraints.

    They want the freedom to set their own constraints.

    To decide, “I want to spend my time writing,” instead of saying, “I am supposed to become a lawyer because that’s what we do in this family.”

    To decide, “I don’t drink alcohol,” instead of saying, “My social circle forces me to have a glass when I’m out.”

    To decide, “I want to live in that house, drive that car, and go on that exotic holiday, and I’m going to make it happen,” instead of saying, “I’m constrained by my talent, potential, current job, or where I grew up.”

    To decide, “I have time to learn a new language because it’s important to me,” instead of saying, “I’m too busy, I can’t (or don’t deserve to) do anything nice for myself.”

    Good or bad, beneficial or misguided, constraints are always there.

    Because life constantly forces you to make decisions, and every decision leads to a new constraint.

    Since it’s challenging to be aware of your decisions and their long-term constraining effects, which constraints do you consider important enough to set consciously (and spend considerable time and effort doing so)?

    Where do you allow others to dictate the constraints you live within?

    Who do you allow to dictate the constraints you live within?

    Pick your freedom battles.

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    #123 Never again

    What gets you going – and what keeps you going?

    Pain. Pleasure. Usually, a combination of both.


    I like being disciplined – it gives me pleasure.

    I also know very well that I don’t want to go back to jumping from one project to another, giving up before reaching any meaningful level of skill or results, and ending up frustrated with myself – the thought alone is painful.


    The pain often gets you going, later to be joined by pleasure in a cocktail of motivation, discipline, and persistence.

    And in this case, strong emotions, passion, and yes, also pain, often lead to more leverage – if you allow yourself to see the lessons it can teach you.

    I never want to be that person again – which helped me figure out that I really want to be this person.

    Living your never again might well help you figure out your yes, for as long as I shall live.

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