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    #113 Make space

    Actions overrule thoughts, and sometimes the best creative act – and the one requiring the most discipline – is doing nothing.

    Because when you slow down your pace, suddenly you realize: there’s space.

    There’s space for the thoughts and feelings you were so afraid to face.

    There’s space to redirect the energy you’ve misplaced.

    There’s space to rediscover everything that escaped your gaze while you were engaged in an endless rat race.

    There’s space for you to remember
    that before you learned not to listen
    and constant distraction erased every trace
    of the insights you so desperately chase
    there was a place of stillness
    a warm embrace
    where all the answers were right there, in your face

    Only when you’ve slowed down your mind’s pace
    you realize
    you were never out of place
    you were navigating a self-inflicted maze
    with only one way out:

    Make space.

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    #168 Purposeful pursuits

    I made an account on Instagram to stay in touch with friends abroad. Now I habitually spend hours a day scrolling through Instagram feeds. Is this a purposeful pursuit?

    I started journaling to clear my head. Now I habitually write and publish insights every day. Is this a purposeful pursuit?

    Good intentions and purposeful actions inevitably turn into a habit, and that can be a good or a bad thing.

    Constantly questioning our actions leads to paralysis.

    But once in a while, gaining presence and reaffirming your intentions can be enough to put you back on track.

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    #249 You already know what I’m going to say

    “You already know what I’m going to say,” the mentor I don’t have tells me.

    It’s true.

    I don’t need anyone to tell me what to do.

    Neither do you.

    All you need is someone to remind you to do what you already know.

    If you had constant presence of mind, you could remind yourself.

    But if you’re anything like me, your clarity gets lost in day-to-day desires, worries, and chores.

    And that’s fine.

    Because that’s what you’re here for, no?

    Not to learn what your life should look like but to receive a reminder to live it daily?

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    #211 If you can do that, you can also do this

    No one is bad at sticking to habits.

    Because everyone’s day-to-day life is stitched together with recurring activities anyway, whether you consciously choose to do them or not.

    Maybe you brush your teeth every day – and that has become a non-negotiable.

    Maybe you wash your hands before every meal – and that has become a non-negotiable.

    Maybe you shower every morning right after waking up – and that has become a non-negotiable.

    Maybe you write every day – and that has become a non-negotiable.

    Maybe you practice yoga three times a week – and that has become a non-negotiable.

    Maybe you spend 10 minutes daily catching up with family, friends, acquaintances, or relatives you haven’t seen in a while – and that has become a non-negotiable.

    Habits are habits.

    And that has an interesting consequence:

    If you can do that, you can also do this.

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    #29 The myth of self-sabotage

    All behavior is inspired by avoiding pain or gaining pleasure – and since you usually act on what your brain perceives as the most intense of the two.

    So if you think you desire something, but then “sabotage” yourself so you never get what you desire, that means you have mixed feelings about desire (and thus inner conflict): deep down, you feel that desire will give you more pain than pleasure.

    In other words, it’s not self-sabotage: it’s your brain protecting you from pain it perceives as stronger than the pleasure you might get from reaching your goal.

    Maybe you desire more money, but deep down, you feel money will corrupt you, or make you lose friends, make you feel guilty, or make you lose your drive.

    Maybe you have a desire to write or create, but you feel the pain of judgment or rejection is stronger than the pleasure of creating.

    Maybe you want to get in shape, but deep down, you feel you’ll give up anyway before reaching any meaningful results, so you’d rather save yourself the pain of future disappointment (a classic self-trust problem).

    Maybe you notice a certain destructive pattern in your relationships, but you believe going to therapy and “opening up that can of worms” will be even worse than perpetuating the current situation.

    If you keep sabotaging yourself, it might be worth to ask yourself the question: what pain am I avoiding? What am I afraid of? In my imagination, what’s going to happen when I reach my goal; both positive AND negative?

    Or even better than just asking: journal about it.

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