#31 Ignore, then highlight more

ByLukas
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A daily insight from Tony Robbins:

Wherever focus goes, energy flows.

Tony Robbins, https://www.tonyrobbins.com/career-business/where-focus-goes-energy-flows/

We’re always ignoring and highlighting parts of our experience to make sense of the world – and it determines the way we feel.

To feel bad, you (temporarily) have to ignore all the events and things you consider positive.

To feel good, you (temporarily) have to ignore events and circumstances that can be challenging.

It all depends on context.

Sometimes, just to function, it’s necessary to ignore.

Sometimes you’re better off highlighting a bit more.

The big challenge: most of the time, we’re not aware of where our focus goes – so we let old habits and patterns decide how we feel – even if they don’t serve us at all.

Here’s an exercise I found useful: Tomorrow, focus on something that’s important for you once an hour (a post-it on your desk or a reminder on your phone can be useful). That way, it remains top of mind (and your energy will flow toward it).

Every hour, also take a moment to become aware of what you’re deleting from your experience, and what you’re highlighting.

  • What am I trying to do today?
  • What am I trying to do right now?
  • What’s important to me?
  • What do I want to focus on… what do I intentionally ignore?

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    5 dead-simple steps to start writing – even if you’ve tried everything:

    1. Set aside dedicated time tomorrow morning. From now on, this is your dedicated time every day.
    2. Start with a Tiny Trust Builder; something that makes it easy for you to show up consistently. Write for one minute. Write one sentence. Write one word. If it feels hard to do every day, think smaller.
    3. First build the habit, then build skill. Right now, you’re building a daily writing habit, not a “daily masterpiece” habit. That comes later.
    4. If step 3 feels hard: write something bad on purpose.
    5. If step 4 feels hard and you don’t feel motivated to write: write anyway. You don’t need motivation to write. You’re a writer. So you write.

    Good luck!

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    #24 Put your actions where your mouth is

    ByLukas

    Here’s a useful insight from James Clear, author of Atomic Habits:

    Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.

    https://jamesclear.com/3-2-1/june-4-2020

    Writing every day reaffirms my “I’m a writer” identity.

    Sitting on the couch every day reaffirms my “I’m a couch potato” identity.

    As a consequence: when you change your actions and your identity starts shifting to align with those actions.

    And that’s how we get out of a rut.

    (The opposite isn’t always true: changing your thoughts without changing your actions will rarely shift your identity. I can think of being a writer as much as I want, if I never put any words on paper, I’m not a writer. That’s one of the principle of cognitive dissonance: Actions overrule Thoughts.)

    Here’s how to change your actions and your identity:

    1. First, you decide who you want to be (and what your new identity looks like).
      “I want to be a yogi: someone who regularly practices yoga and takes care of his mind and body.”
    2. Second you get clear on what that would look like in your daily life: which actions you’ll take that are different from the ones you’re taking right now.
      “Instead of watching TV before, my “yogi identity” would do a daily yoga session.
    3. Third, you gain enough leverage over yourself to go against your current habits, and take those different action for a prolonged period of time.
      This is where most resistance comes up, because my old “couch potato identity” is fighting my “yogi” identity — and through my past actions, the couch potato has received WAY more votes than the yogi.
      So you need perseverance at this stage. Remember, every time you take those new actions, you’re voting for your new identity and new habits are taking roots.
    4. At some point, you reach a tipping point productivity experts call “habit escape velocity“: you now have so much momentum that you’re out of the sphere of influence of your old habits, and your new habits (and new identity) can take root.

    Which begs the question…

    Where are you saying you want to be a certain way, but you’re voting for something else through your daily actions?

    Lukas Van Vyve

    Put your money (or your actions) where your mouth is.

  • #307 Why wait for the pain when you can write today?

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    You can wait to start writing until that moment when the frustration builds up so much that not writing becomes unbearable.

    But why wait for the pain if you could just write today?

    After all, you’re not waiting to become a writer. You’re already a writer. You’re just not writing. Yet.

    And all of that can change in one moment of deciding not to wait, but to write.

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    #16 The insights have always been here

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    Creativity isn’t about inventing new concepts, thoughts, pieces of art or machines out of thin air.

    It’s not even making new connections between unrelated concepts.

    Creativity is exposing connections that have always been there but nobody has noticed before.

    Again: the connections have always been there. The hard part is noticing them.

    That requires presence. Slowing down. Taking a step back. Asking “Where have I seen this before?”. Trusting your mind for doing what it does best: recognizing patterns. Paying attention. Sometimes, paying no attention at all and letting the breakout principle work its magic.

    This view of creativity can set you free from a lifetime of frustration
    because once life becomes one big exploration
    where every detour, every diversion, every event
    no matter how unimportant or seemingly insignificant
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    a new breakthrough, a connection to stumble upon…

    And once the crushing pressure – invent something you must
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    replaced by curiosity and wanderlust
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    that everything you ever wanted to know, feel, see, hear
    every insight or desire you hold dear
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    hidden in plain view, underneath the world’s veneer.

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    #197 Reminders upon reminders upon reminders

    ByLukas

    Intentional living is about reminding yourself of what’s most important to you.

    Reminding yourself that you can choose to be a writer, a runner, a musician, an artist, or a bon vivant.

    Reminding yourself that you can choose to be kind to others.

    Reminding yourself that you have a choice to act differently.

    Reminding yourself that the past does not equal the future.

    Reminding yourself that this, too, shall pass.

    Reminding yourself that at any given moment, whatever reminder you need the most, you likely won’t think of yourself.

    Reminding yourself that for this reason, it’s OK to get help and let someone else remind you with short daily notes.

    And me, reminding myself that the act of writing daily reminders for you is the reminder I need to remember that I do, in fact, choose to be consistent, and I choose to be a writer.

    Reminders upon reminders upon reminders that we will constantly get distracted, and we will always have the choice to come back to what truly matters.

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