If only someone told you before
That no matter how loud the others shout
Nobody has it figured out
If only someone told you before
That the rules you use to govern your life
Aren’t set in stone?
If only someone told you before
That it’s totally okay
To find your own way
If only someone told you before…
When writing, the most hurtful words enter your head when no words leave your pen.
A blank page is a mirror of our own insecurities, frightening, judgmental…
I found the only way to get through is meeting myself where I am.
Inspired, afraid, angry, frustrated, fearful of poor work, poor words, or no words at all…
This is where the journey starts.
The moment I accept that, I am free again.
This is why I love Stream-Of-Consciousness writing. Whatever state I am in, I transfer the stream of thoughts, the inner dialogue to the page, and see where the flow takes me.
Here’s what I’ve learned: it always takes me somewhere.
And that’s enough to get started.
Because a blank page is also a promise of all my creative potential, waiting to materialize.
And when the words finally emerge
everything flows
and my self-trust grows.
A voice in my head says I can’t write every day?
I’ll write 2 sentences every day, just to prove to that voice that I, in fact, CAN write every day.
A voice in my head says I don’t have the perseverance to train for (and then finish) a marathon?
I’ll do something small to prepare for the marathon every day, so at the end of each day, I can say to myself “The proof is there, today was another day of me persevering and preparing for a marathon.”
You can’t brute-force your way out of an “I can’t do this” belief. You can only take small actions that start proving the contrary.
Slowly but surely, you chip away at the credibility of the naysayer voice, until the scale starts tipping over, and an encouraging voice emerges.
One of the most potent drivers of change AND perpetuators of old habits is cognitive dissonance:
In the field of psychology, cognitive dissonance is the perception of contradictory information, and the mental toll of it. Relevant items of information include a person’s actions, feelings, ideas, beliefs, values, and things in the environment. Cognitive dissonance is typically experienced as psychological stress when persons participate in an action that goes against one or more of those things.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_dissonance
What’s interesting about cognitive dissonance is that both “sides” of the dissonance are not equal:
If you think one thing, but you do something else, eventually you’ll start believing what you do, not what you think.
In other words: actions overrule thoughts.
We usually start in the first scenario until we gain enough leverage over ourselves to change our actions. The moment we change our actions to actions that conflict with our thoughts/beliefs, we’re creating cognitive dissonance.
Then, if we follow through with our new actions, our beliefs start to change.
The big turning point is that moment where you start taking a different action.
Which begs the question:
Identify your leverage points that jolt you into action, and you gain power over your beliefs and identity.
It’s easy to be non-violent when you’re in a flower garden
Josh Waitzkin – The art of learning
It’s easy to be kind to others when the world has always been kind to you.
It’s easy to say you want to be a writer when you never really put yourself out there to prove it.
To learn writing, I must confront the uncomfortable parts of writing – and learn not to respond by running away from it.
To learn non-violence, I must confront violence – and learn not to respond with violence in return.
To learn kindness, I must confront being hurt – and learn not to use that as an excuse to perpetuate the cycle of hurt.
To build trust in myself, I must stay true to my values under difficult conditions.
You may want to be a published, acclaimed author, or an online writer with a massive audience. But today, all you have to do is write.
You may want to be the best marathon runner in your country. But today, all you have to do is go for one run.
Whatever lofty vision you have for yourself, today, all you have to do is take one tiny step, one Tiny Trust Builder moving you closer to the person you want to be.
Things may look backwards today.
But one day, you’ll look back and realize that it was part of your roadmap.
Maybe a byway.
Maybe a detour.
But never not part of your roadmap.
Regardless of your path, tomorrow is another day.
Follow the roadmap, no matter what.
Afer all…
What else can you do?
