Your best writing can only happen when you’re writing.
Your running PR can only happen when you’re running.
And your most cherished moments with friends can only happen when you’re with your friends.
You can try to time life.
But the only foolproof way to live your best moments do is by showing up in the moment.
On Sunday, January 3 2021, motivated by an emotional low point and an article I read on writing “Morning Pages”, I grabbed an old notepad, pen, started writing and didn’t stop until I had filled three pages.
It was the first time in 5 years I wrote something by hand, and the first time in my life I journaled.
I liked it so much that I kept writing every day.
We’re 625 days later now, and I never stopped. 3 pages of Stream of Consciousness journaling a day, 625 days in a row: that’s 1875 pages or relaxing the mind and letting my train of thoughts “stream onto the page”, unfiltered, playfully wandering through my experiences, thoughts, and insights.
But no matter how enjoyable the wandering, lately I’ve been feeling the urge to create something tangible (and valuable) with all those insights and ideas.
Here’s how I envision it:
Daily journaling (Morning Pages) unblocks my stream of consciousness and transfers it to paper, forming the raw material out of which ideas and insights can emerge. In my experience, once I’ve gone through the sea of fluff, I can expect an insight (maybe two if I’m lucky).
Daily sculpting helps me remove all the fluff until only the pure insights are left, and then refine them, like a sculptor chiseling away at a massive block of marble, working to reveal the essence hidden inside of it.
“If you want me to give you a two-hour presentation, I am ready today. If you want only a five-minute speech, it will take me two weeks to prepare.”
– Mark Twain
Sculpting is the hard part. Because when you think about it, the raw material – the ideas and insights – have always been there, just like the famous Davide sculpture has always been hidden inside the block of marble Michelangelo hauled from a quarry in Carrara in the Apuan alps. He just paid attention in a different way and saw what many others didn’t see.
Yet, he wasn’t the only person who had the idea to use a block of marble to sculpt a Biblical figure. But the way he shaped that raw material into something impactful, beautiful, that accurately represents what you had in mind…
That made all the difference.
And it’s a skill that takes a long time to hone.
Which might be why I’ve avoided it for so long. So far, out of 1875 pages of journaling, I’ve published… 4 articles.
Time to change that. From today onwards, I’m adding a “sculpting session” to my day and will publish the result as a “Daily Insight”.
I don’t expect it to be particularly insightful anytime soon. Maybe I’ll never be fully satisfied with anything I come up with.
But when I stick to it every day and arrive at day 50, 100, or day 625…
Who knows how much I’ll have learned about writing, insight generation, communication,…?
Who knows what will have emerged?
Surely more than if I’d do nothing.
Which leads me to the question I’m asking myself today:
What would it feel like if I remove all external judgment from writing and see writing as the practice of exploring thoughts, ideas, feelings, insights, and becoming ever more accurate and impactful in representing them?
My current answer: I’d be focused much more on process and progress, not on competition. I’d feel how I’m getting better every day, not in relationship to others (as in competition), but in relationship to the purest expression of a certain art, skill, or action.
Sculpting away, day by day.
A voice in my head says I can’t write every day?
I’ll write 2 sentences every day, just to prove to that voice that I, in fact, CAN write every day.
A voice in my head says I don’t have the perseverance to train for (and then finish) a marathon?
I’ll do something small to prepare for the marathon every day, so at the end of each day, I can say to myself “The proof is there, today was another day of me persevering and preparing for a marathon.”
You can’t brute-force your way out of an “I can’t do this” belief. You can only take small actions that start proving the contrary.
Slowly but surely, you chip away at the credibility of the naysayer voice, until the scale starts tipping over, and an encouraging voice emerges.
You see how few things you have to do to live a satisfying and reverent life?
Marcus Aurelius, Meditations
But what are those few things that lead to a satisfying life?
Do we decide ourselves, or let others – or society – decide for us?
835 days ago, I started writing three pages of stream-of-consciousness journaling every day.
It’s my one habit where I haven’t missed a single day, but not because I’m afraid I would quit if I skipped a day (I’ve built up enough self-trust and elastic discipline by now).
Not because I derive so much creative and therapeutic benefit from it either (I do, but skipping a day here and there wouldn’t diminish that benefit).
None of that would warrant my hardliner habit approach to journaling, my friend. You know I’m more of an elastic discipline guy.
The real reason I never miss a journaling day is that it was the first habit I ever managed to stick to consistently.
Because of that, it reminds me that I can change my beliefs, habits, and identity, no matter how hard it seems.
It reminds me that, on that momentous day in 2021, my identity started shifting from eternal quitter to consistent go-getter.
It reminds me that actions overrule thoughts.
In other words: Journaling daily has become a beacon of self-trust.
And I’ll be eternally grateful for the day I decided to take a pen and put it on the paper.
I hope you have such a beacon of self-trust in your life.
And if not, I hope you’ll find or create one soon.
P.S. Maybe you already have a beacon of trust, but you’re not aware of it.
After all, the specific activity doesn’t matter.
You could go for a walk every day. Play the guitar. Learn a new phrase in a new language. Do one pushup.
Anything that reminds you of the fact that you, too, can do things aligned with who you want to be.
P.P.S I’m curious… If you have a beacon of self-trust, what is it? Let me know by replying to this Insight!
Writing is hard – but I’d love to be a writer, so I write.
Painting is hard – and I wouldn’t love being a painter, so I don’t paint.
Some things are worth the struggle and sacrifice for me – and maybe not for you.
Some things are worth the struggle and sacrifice for you – and maybe not for me.
If you knew you’d write more words tomorrow anyway…
If you knew you’d put your body in a yoga pose every day…
If you knew you’d write the same song over and over again either way…
If you knew there’d be no pressure to nail the guitar piece because tomorrow there’s another chance to play…
If you knew you’d have a lifetime of practice ahead of you – what would you focus on today?
