#270 How to gain trust, acceptance, and comfort

ByLukas
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It’s hard not to trust someone who fully trusts themselves.

But it’s hard not to accept someone who fully accepts themselves.

It’s hard not to be at ease around someone fully at ease with themselves.

In other words: if you want others to trust, accept, and be at ease with you, first learn to trust, accept, and be at ease with yourself.

You don’t need anyone else for that – just some tiny daily actions that prove that trust, acceptance, and comfort to yourself.

Oh, and you could start with that today.

You don’t have to.

But you could. And if you could, why wouldn’t you?

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    #193 How do you react?

    ByLukas

    You want to get the guitar piece exactly right but still trip up once in a while. How do you react?

    You want to run a marathon but can’t even finish half a marathon yet. How do you react?

    You want to explain how you feel but end up feeling misunderstood. How do you react?

    Do you let frustration hold you back?

    Or do you use the gap as leverage to change your actions and bridge the gap between your current and desired identity?

  • #439 Resolve can bring you far

    ByLukas

    I can’t predict what will happen tomorrow – or even today.

    But I do know that today, I resolve to write.

    And tomorrow I resolve to write once again.

    And that resolve has brought me to 439 consecutive days of writing.

    439 days of writing, despite living in an unpredictable world.

    439 days of realizing most obstacles are excuses.

    439 days of proving that resolve can bring you pretty far.

  • #212 Your beacon of trust

    ByLukas

    835 days ago, I started writing three pages of stream-of-consciousness journaling every day.

    It’s my one habit where I haven’t missed a single day, but not because I’m afraid I would quit if I skipped a day (I’ve built up enough self-trust and elastic discipline by now).

    Not because I derive so much creative and therapeutic benefit from it either (I do, but skipping a day here and there wouldn’t diminish that benefit).

    None of that would warrant my hardliner habit approach to journaling, my friend. You know I’m more of an elastic discipline guy.

    The real reason I never miss a journaling day is that it was the first habit I ever managed to stick to consistently.

    Because of that, it reminds me that I can change my beliefs, habits, and identity, no matter how hard it seems.

    It reminds me that, on that momentous day in 2021, my identity started shifting from eternal quitter to consistent go-getter.

    It reminds me that actions overrule thoughts.

    In other words: Journaling daily has become a beacon of self-trust.

    And I’ll be eternally grateful for the day I decided to take a pen and put it on the paper.

    I hope you have such a beacon of self-trust in your life.

    And if not, I hope you’ll find or create one soon.

    P.S. Maybe you already have a beacon of trust, but you’re not aware of it.

    After all, the specific activity doesn’t matter.

    You could go for a walk every day. Play the guitar. Learn a new phrase in a new language. Do one pushup.

    Anything that reminds you of the fact that you, too, can do things aligned with who you want to be.

    P.P.S I’m curious… If you have a beacon of self-trust, what is it? Let me know by replying to this Insight!

  • #167 Worry or dream a thousand times

    ByLukas

    I can worry a thousand times until my worries come true.

    I can envision my dreams a thousand times until my dreams come true.

    Not because of the act of worrying or the dreaming itself.

    But because my worries or dreams will incite different present actions taking me down different paths.

    Whatever future I focus on a thousand times, I’ll be drawn towards.

    Choose wisely.

  • | |

    #86 Practice daily, measure progress on average

    ByLukas

    The article I publish today may be worse than one I wrote 2 months ago.

    I may struggle today with a guitar piece I played effortlessly last week.

    And when I meditate today, my mind may be all over the place, even though last week it was calm as water.

    On any given day, I may feel that I’m making progress, that I’ve reached a plateau, or even that I’m going backwards.

    But it doesn’t matter.

    Progress isn’t always visible in daily practice. But without daily practice, there is no progress.

    If I stick to daily practice, on average, I’ll get better. I’ll start having more good days than bad. And slowly but surely, my ‘bad days’ will start being better than what I consider a ‘good day’ right now.

    Progress, averaged out is what it’s all about.

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