#221 How to appease the worrier mind

ByLukas
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How likely is the scenario you’re worrying about?
And how impactful or life-threatening is that scenario?
Now, how much mental bandwidth is worrying about it taking up?
Are your worries proportionate to the actual danger?
Should you be worrying at all?
If not, could you stop right away?

Of course, you and I both know that’s not always how it works, my friend.

Because even if we know rationally that we shouldn’t worry, the worrier mind tends to scoff at answering rational questions.

Yet today, I had an insight: maybe those questions aren’t meant to dismiss the worrier mind at all but empower the sane mind, temporarily suppressed and overpowered?

Maybe they can provide enough encouragement to make the sane mind stand up for itself again and say, “Enough is enough.”

Maybe that way, the sane mind will put the worrier mind back in its place, reminding it of the only task where it truly shines: protect us from life-threatening risks.

Or maybe not. I don’t know, my friend. You’ve seen me: I’m just another human with good days and bad—productive days and lazy. Days of irrational fears and worry, and days of relaxing, dreaming, and visioning.

But this I do know: worrying too much has never improved my mood, and I doubt it has ever improved yours.

So if you’ve had an overactive worrier mind lately, trying won’t hurt.

Let me know how it goes.

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    #135 Violence in a flower garden

    ByLukas

    It’s easy to be non-violent when you’re in a flower garden

    Josh Waitzkin – The art of learning

    It’s easy to be kind to others when the world has always been kind to you.

    It’s easy to say you want to be a writer when you never really put yourself out there to prove it.

    To learn writing, I must confront the uncomfortable parts of writing – and learn not to respond by running away from it.

    To learn non-violence, I must confront violence – and learn not to respond with violence in return.

    To learn kindness, I must confront being hurt – and learn not to use that as an excuse to perpetuate the cycle of hurt.

    To build trust in myself, I must stay true to my values under difficult conditions.

  • |

    #41 Unaligned agendas

    ByLukas

    Benefit and harm all depend on your perspective. The futurist John Smart suggests looking at phenomena, trends, and events through four different lenses (the “Foresight Tetrad“):

    • Personal
    • Organizational (=collective)
    • Global
    • Universal

    Every level has its own agenda, but their interests are rarely fully aligned.

    For example: for evolution and natural selection to work, a life form must have a reasonably short lifespan, reproduce quickly, and most importantly, not clone their DNA perfectly. Because small genetic reproduction errors help a species evolve and become better adapted to our environment.

    Sn an organizational/collective level (taking all of humanity together) those genetic errors are a good thing. In fact, without them, human beings in our current brain, with our current intelligence, wouldn’t even exist. Not at a species level, and not at an individual level.

    But to stumble upon a couple of beneficial “genetic errors”, evolution also needs tons of harmful genetic errors.

    That means that every newborn runs the risk of genetic errors that can cause medical conditions, pain, and suffering – on an individual level.

    We suffer individually to evolve collectively.

    Another example: in our quest to improve the condition of humanity as a whole (at the organizational/collective level), we’re harming other species and change the climate (at a global level).

    Ignoring the principles the universe and the earth as an ecosystem might well lead to collapse of that ecosystem – and result in the collapse of humanity.

    The universe has an agenda.
    Natural selection has an agenda.
    The global earth has an agenda.
    Humanity as a whole has an agenda.
    Individuals have an agenda.

    We can’t afford to ignore any.

  • |

    #175 Perpetuating painful comfort

    ByLukas

    We naturally move towards pleasure and away from pain – with one exception: painful comfort.

    If you’re used to believing that you’re bad at languages, there’s painful comfort in struggling with languages.

    If you’re used to negative self-talk, there’s painful comfort in negative self-talk.

    If you’re used to working 12-hour days, there’s painful comfort in working 12-hour days.

    If you’re used to constant conflict, there’s painful comfort in constant conflict.

    If you’re used to neglect, there’s painful comfort in neglect.

    Painful comfort is keeping you comfortable AND hurting you.

    Years of conditioning have given it an irresistible pull – until you decide to take a leap of faith and start believing that you, too, can change.

    Where are you perpetuating painful comfort in life?

  • |

    #203 What makes your aspirations valuable

    ByLukas

    An aspiring writer who doesn’t believe writing is a valuable skill in our current society and focuses on building a traditional career instead.

    An aspiring runner who doesn’t believe running is a good use of their time in our current society and goes out for drinks every night.

    An aspiring classical musician who doesn’t believe society will ever appreciate their art – and goes into pop music instead.

    If you want to turn aspirations into achievements, you’ll have to decide for yourself what’s valuable, even if it goes against what society and tradition prescribe.

    So to make writing a valuable skill, write.

    To make running a good use of your time, run.

    To make the world appreciate your classical music, practice classical music.

    To make anything worthwhile, show that it’s worth your while.

    Because going against the mainstream is not just necessary to achieve your aspirations – it’s what makes your aspirations valuable in the first place.

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