The purpose of goals is not achieving them.
It’s giving direction to your current actions.
And that’s what makes them different from a dreams.
Now. If goals give direction to current actions…
And current actions overrule your current beliefs and shape your identity…
Then goals shape who you are today, tomorrow, and who you’ll be long after achieving them.
The achievement is fleeting, the personality change lasting.
Choose wisely.
Be fulfilled with what you do (and be happy with what you don’t do).
Be intentional with what you do.
Be consistent with what you do.
Because what you do will change you.
And when you change, you might just get everything you ever wanted.
And you might just become happy with what you have.
Wanting to improve certain areas in your life is powerful.
But that improvement gap comes with a pressure trap.
Because if you believe you’re in control of your actions, the moments you accidentally fall back into old patterns become extra frustrating.
When your self-worth becomes attached to your behavior, every action becomes a judgment of character.
And so the pressure mounts.
Missing one workout means you’re not worthy of running a marathon.
Missing one day of writing means you’ll never be a writer.
Making one communication mistake, making someone angry, means you’re a terrible person.
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To make that pressure bearable, build self-trust (for example, through Tiny Trust Builders).
Trust that you can run a marathon, even if you miss a workout.
Trust that you can be a writer, even if you miss one day of writing.
Trust that you can be a good person, even if you’ve made mistakes or upset some people.
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Notice the improvement gap between where you are and where you want to go.
Let the majority of your actions be a vote for the person you want to be.
Focus on elastic discipline, not hardliner habits.
Do all that, and you’ll feel more fulfilled and free.
You can’t change the fact that winning makes you a winner and losing makes you a loser.
But you CAN:
What if, instead of only winning when you beat your opponent, to you, winning means giving it your all and putting your heart on the line?
What if, to you, winning doesn’t mean writing a bestselling book (which is out of your control anyway) but showing the discipline to write a book in the first place… a book that potentially could be a bestseller?
What if, to you, losing doesn’t mean suffering a defeat but giving in to your fear and never starting in the first place?
Make your own rules around winning and losing, and don’t make them too hard on yourself. It’s a simple and viable way to feel better every day.
Opportunities often stare us in the face in our daily interactions, routines, and familiar environments – and that guise of the ordinary makes them invisible.
After all, seeing the value in something that comes so easily to you is hard.
So it takes an outsider to point it out.
What skill are you taking for granted even though it’s really pretty cool?
What comes naturally to you but is hard for others to do?
Which problems can you solve effortlessly? If you solve them for others, how would that set them free?
You don’t have to be good at this today.
If you were, you wouldn’t have to practice.
And if you wouldn’t have to practice, it wouldn’t be fun
And definitely not fulfilling.
You don’t have to be good at this today.
You’ve spent your lifetime bumping into the limits of what you deem possible.
And you’ve also spent your lifetime overcoming the seemingly impossible.
Sit. Crawl. Walk. Speak. Read. Find love. Get over loss and heartbreak. Travel. Invent. Create. Learn. Write.
Overcoming the seemingly impossible is what makes you you.
Once you accept that, the question shifts from, “What’s possible for me?” to, “What are you overcoming next?”
