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    #92 The true purpose of memory

    Memory isn’t an objective account of the past – and that’s not its purpose either.

    Memory stores the lessons we extract from life experience. And to do so, it modifies, adds, subtracts, highlights, and hides.

    Hot soup burns my tongue – next time, I’ll remember the pain, but not if it was tomato soup or chicken soup. And I’ll remember to wait a couple of minutes before having the first spoon.

    Experience lived. Irrelevant info deleted. Lesson learned. Memory created.

    My country gets invaded – and that causes so much pain, I won’t just deliver an objective account of what happened: I’ll make sure to tell everyone who the evil guys are too.

    Experience lived. Story modified. Lesson learned. Memory created.

    I eat the most delicious dessert at a Mexico City restaurant – that’s the memory I’m going to tell my friends about, not which glass of dessert wine I had with it.

    Experience lived. Dessert highlighted. Lesson learned. Memory created.

    You’re going to make memories anyway. Which lessons do you want to learn?

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    #137 Until here and no further

    I’ll never believe I can write until I allow myself to write.

    I’ll never believe I can grow my body stronger until I allow myself to do do something consistently to grow my body stronger.

    I’ll never believe I can mend a mistreated mind until I allow my mind to be mended.

    I’ll never believe I can heal a broken heart until I allow myself to start loving again.


    You don’t start doing something because you believe you can do it.

    You do it because you find leverage to allow yourself to do it, even if it feels outside your comfort zone.

    Until here, and no further.

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    #59 Entity Mindset vs Incremental Mindset

    Do you believe you’re good at something solely because of talent, invalidating all the work you’re putting in?

    Or do you believe you can change the course of your life, and let your daily actions shape who you are?

    The American psychologist and author of the book “Mindset” Carol Dweck describes how the way you think about your abilities can make or break your success in life:

    • Entity (fixed) mindset: “I’m good at languages, I’m bad at math”
    • Incremental (growth) mindset: “I worked hard on this, I’m learning, I’m discovering how to do this”

    An entity mindset makes you run into a wall

    When things get tough, people with an entity mindset often give up, because they don’t truly believe they can get much better.

    After all,I if you believe it’s all about innate ability, then why make any effort to develop strengths or weaknesses?

    An entity mindset also leads to fear of failure and perfectionism. If you’re believed to have an innate, fixed talent that’s set in stone, you’ll constantly need to live up to an unreasonably high standard for that particular talent.

    An incremental mindset makes you thrive

    People with an incremental mindset, on the other hand, thrive in tough situations: they know that through perseverance and a focus on daily practice and perseverance they can develop their skills and talents.

    Even if predisposition plays an important role, switching to an incremental mindset will always make you feel better about yourself and your daily actions.

    And while education and childhood experiences have a large impact on your mindset – you can always change your mind – by changing your actions.

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