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  • #36 Life isn’t better when you’re a bad forgetter

    Perfect recall is paralyzing.

    Not everything is worth remembering.

    And life isn’t better when you’re a bad forgetter.

    Maybe life becomes easier to navigate if we remember the fact that we’ll always make mistakes – and the lessons we learn from them – yet forget (forgive) the specific slip-ups we and others make.

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    #1 Sculpting Away, Day By Day

    On Sunday, January 3 2021, motivated by an emotional low point and an article I read on writing “Morning Pages”, I grabbed an old notepad, pen, started writing and didn’t stop until I had filled three pages.

    It was the first time in 5 years I wrote something by hand, and the first time in my life I journaled.

    I liked it so much that I kept writing every day.

    We’re 625 days later now, and I never stopped. 3 pages of Stream of Consciousness journaling a day, 625 days in a row: that’s 1875 pages or relaxing the mind and letting my train of thoughts “stream onto the page”, unfiltered, playfully wandering through my experiences, thoughts, and insights.

    But no matter how enjoyable the wandering, lately I’ve been feeling the urge to create something tangible (and valuable) with all those insights and ideas.

    Here’s how I envision it:

    Daily journaling (Morning Pages) unblocks my stream of consciousness and transfers it to paper, forming the raw material out of which ideas and insights can emerge. In my experience, once I’ve gone through the sea of fluff, I can expect an insight (maybe two if I’m lucky).

    Daily sculpting helps me remove all the fluff until only the pure insights are left, and then refine them, like a sculptor chiseling away at a massive block of marble, working to reveal the essence hidden inside of it.

    sculpting away day by day
    Sculpting until only the essence remains

    “If you want me to give you a two-hour presentation, I am ready today. If you want only a five-minute speech, it will take me two weeks to prepare.”

    – Mark Twain

    Sculpting is the hard part. Because when you think about it, the raw material – the ideas and insights – have always been there, just like the famous Davide sculpture has always been hidden inside the block of marble Michelangelo hauled from a quarry in Carrara in the Apuan alps. He just paid attention in a different way and saw what many others didn’t see.

    Yet, he wasn’t the only person who had the idea to use a block of marble to sculpt a Biblical figure. But the way he shaped that raw material into something impactful, beautiful, that accurately represents what you had in mind…

    That made all the difference.

    And it’s a skill that takes a long time to hone.

    Which might be why I’ve avoided it for so long. So far, out of 1875 pages of journaling, I’ve published… 4 articles.

    Time to change that. From today onwards, I’m adding a “sculpting session” to my day and will publish the result as a “Daily Insight”.

    I don’t expect it to be particularly insightful anytime soon. Maybe I’ll never be fully satisfied with anything I come up with.

    But when I stick to it every day and arrive at day 50, 100, or day 625…

    Who knows how much I’ll have learned about writing, insight generation, communication,…?

    Who knows what will have emerged?

    Surely more than if I’d do nothing.

    Which leads me to the question I’m asking myself today:

    What would it feel like if I remove all external judgment from writing and see writing as the practice of exploring thoughts, ideas, feelings, insights, and becoming ever more accurate and impactful in representing them?

    My current answer: I’d be focused much more on process and progress, not on competition. I’d feel how I’m getting better every day, not in relationship to others (as in competition), but in relationship to the purest expression of a certain art, skill, or action.

    Sculpting away, day by day.

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    #73 Why am I rushing?

    Journaling question of the day: Why am I rushing?

    Out of habit and automaticity – mindlessness caused by endless repetition?

    Out of discomfort – I want to get out of this situation as soon as possible?

    Out of impatience – I expect whatever comes next to be more interesting or riveting?

    What would happen if I don’t rush this?

    By interrupting the automaticity and slowing down, will I reopen my senses and discover new nuances?

    By not rushing away from discomfort, will I discover everything is not as bad as I feared it would be?

    By resisting impatience, can I become fascinated with whatever is happening right here, right now?

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    #265 Dance the barbell balance of life

    Living a balanced life doesn’t mean living average experiences.

    It’s more like a barbell, or a seesaw, where you go all in on complementary actions.

    Work hard, rest hard.

    Write with total focus, then fully let go when you’ve hit your word target.

    Work out with full intensity, then let your body fully recover.

    So when you’re out of balance, the solution is not to come closer to the middle.

    Instead, you start doing less of what you’re already doing or add more of the polar opposite of what you’re already doing.

    Figure out your polar opposite pairs, and give them both the attention they deserve. That’s how you dance the barbell balance of life.

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