Getting better at something isn’t about making no mistakes.
It’s not even about making fewer mistakes.
It’s about repeating fewer rookie mistakes, so there’s space for you to notice more subtle errors.
If you think you’re making fewer mistakes, you’re either not progressing past your current skill level, or you’re not paying attention.
Living a balanced life doesn’t mean living average experiences.
It’s more like a barbell, or a seesaw, where you go all in on complementary actions.
Work hard, rest hard.
Write with total focus, then fully let go when you’ve hit your word target.
Work out with full intensity, then let your body fully recover.
So when you’re out of balance, the solution is not to come closer to the middle.
Instead, you start doing less of what you’re already doing or add more of the polar opposite of what you’re already doing.
Figure out your polar opposite pairs, and give them both the attention they deserve. That’s how you dance the barbell balance of life.
I write about the same topics over and over again, with slightly different words.
I listen to people explaining the same topics over and over again, with a slightly different interpretation.
I practice the same breathing exercises every day, becoming aware of changes so subtle it’s hard to believe they make any difference.
While all that energy spent on what seems like “repeating” and “reviewing” might seem like a waste of time, the constant revisiting of things we already know is how I grow.
Because with every repetition I’m discovering a new part of the same insight.
A new nuance that in itself might seem insignificant, but added to my personal experience, insights, understanding, might make all the difference.
And with every new insight, I become a little less blind to what’s already here.
In the process, I have to accept that the perfect words might never come.
The perfect explanation might never come.
The perfect execution of a skill might never happen.
But if I stay the course, my understanding of what matters to me in life will always keep growing.
At some point, through all the practicing, learning, reading, writing, I might stumble upon a groundbreaking insight.
Or maybe it never happens.
It doesn’t matter. I feel fulfilled regardless… As long as I keep sculpting away, day by day.
Nobody really knows what life is going to be bring.
But almost all of us are going to fine either way, not matter what life brings.
Without stress about what life might throw at you, what would you do?
What would you create?
Where would you go?
Who would you choose to be?
Most people are kind at heart and would be happy to help you – and other people – out all the time if only, you know, just like you, they didn’t have a life of their own full of obligations, dreams, passions, and worries. In other words, a life that doesn’t entirely revolve around being at your service.
I don’t know if that always holds for everyone, my friend. And it’s not a free pass for selfishness or treating others poorly.
But I do like to believe it’s mainly a mental bandwidth challenge and that deep down, people always want to help.
Because it makes me more understanding and empathetic. For other people’s behavior and my own.
After all, it’s not about you. It’s not about me. It’s about us all.
The outcome is not the book.
The outcome is not the marathon.
The outcome is not the successful business.
The outcome is not even the daily habit you form, even though they’re the stepping stones you need.
The outcome is the embodiment of the changes we’ve internalized, the growth we’ve experienced, and the evolution we’ve undergone, allowing us to say, “This is what I now stand for. This is what I believe is possible.”
The outcome is the identity.
Maybe it’s less about “What do I want to achieve?” and more about “What do I want to believe?”
Your story has drama. Suspense.
New seasons. Old friends.
But your story never stops.
It will be remembered.
Which means there’s no beginning. And no end.
