#543 Dissolve your worries

If I don’t meditate today, will I ever become a consistent practitioner?

If I don’t go for that run today, will I ever become a runner?

If I don’t stick to my diet today, will I ever get in shape?

There’s a time and place for being a hardliner about your habits – the first 30-45 days when the naysayer voice in your head still says, “let’s see how long it takes before I give up again.”

After all, you’re building a new identity and will still be pulled back towards your old ways.

But at some point, hardliners need to make the switch to “elastic discipline“:

Being disciplined about your daily practice while trusting yourself enough that when life inevitably puts you in a situation where you HAVE to violate your principles, you can navigate it, adjust your behavior, and afterward, like an elastic band, bounce back to your disciplined practice.

This is an overlooked part of habit-building. Because if you don’t consciously build the self-trust that you can, in fact, persevere despite setbacks, you’ll live in fear of giving up forever.

So initially, when you start a new habit, be a hardliner.

Use Tiny Trust Builders to start building confidence in your ability to persevere.

After 30 days, start asking yourself: do I trust myself enough to skip a day and then bounce back to my disciplined practice tomorrow?

Skip a day, then start again.

Build self-trust.

Feel your confidence and self-worth grow.

Cultivate “elastic discipline” and become free.

Question: Do you know how old I’ll be by the time I learn to play the piano?

Answer: The same age you will be if you don’t.

Julia Cameron, The Artist’s Way

Some skills take years of practice before I’m any good at them. But I’m living those years anyway. And while society and systemic pressure might push me down a certain path, I still have a say in how I spend every day.

Whether I publish a blog post today or not, I’ll go to bed tonight and the sun will still come up tomorrow.

Whether I write every day in the coming 10 years or not, in 10 years I’ll still turn 40.

The only difference: will I feel that my actions were aligned with who I want to be? Or will I feel regret instead?

Some aspirations are worth the time you’re living anyway.

It’s not possible for you to stop being a writer.

It’s only possible to forget you’re meant to be a writer.

Similary, you’ll never “turn into a writer”.

You reduce resistance until you’ve set free the writer in you.