Make your habits easy to stick to by making them tiny.
Make your habits tiny to make it easy to build self-trust.
Make your habits part of your identity, so that you’re not scared to answer the following question anymore:
Did you do it or not?
Create something or not. Today is still happening.
Learn something or not. Today is still happening.
Relax or not. Today is still happening.
Spend time with your loved ones or not. Today is still happening.
No matter how you feel, no matter what you do, today is still happening.
That may be scary, defeating, or motivating. But today is still happening.
We all want to avoid doing things that make us miserable.
Yet avoiding them often takes the shape of prioritizing them.
“I’ll do this unpleasant thing first so that I can get to the fun stuff.”
Unfortunately, it seems to be a rule that the more unpleasant tasks you cross off your to-do list, the more unpleasant tasks appear on your to-do list.
Sometimes it makes sense to do the essential things first, even if that means you keep the unpleasant things on your to-do list.
This is not a free pass to avoid unpleasant things and only do something you like.
It’s about doing the things that matter, regardless of whether they’re pleasant.
It’s about coming to terms with the fact that you’ll probably always drown in chores and busy work to do, then doing the important stuff anyway.
Journaling question of the day:
Where are you prioritizing and attracting things that make you miserable instead of doing the work that matters?
Some days I have ten ideas to write about. Some days, zero.
But when I lack ideas to write about, the ideas aren’t really gone. I’m in a scarcity state: my brain chemistry prevents me from accessing the insights.
When I feel lonely, friends and family I can connect with aren’t really gone. I’m in a scarcity state: my brain chemistry prevents me from connecting with them.
Scarcity is like pollution.
When noise pollution of cars, planes and construction machines drown out the singing of the birds, the birds aren’t really gone. I just can’t hear them.
When light pollution drowns out the stars, they’re not really gone. I just can’t see them.
So how do I get out of scarcity? How do I reduce pollution?
Here’s what works for me:
Notice I’m in scarcity mode. Then move. Meditate. Do stream-of-consciousness journaling.
Then find a place where I hear the birds.
Find a place where I can see the stars.
Write anyway.
And connect with friends and family anyway.
You may not always know Why. Or How. Or What exactly.
And yet, you know that it Must happen.
Maybe that’s enough.
“I can only do that when…”
Remove the “only” and the when”.
I can do that.
And so can you.
It only takes one new habit to restore faith in the malleable mind.
“I’ve never been good at languages. Until I learned my first foreign language. If I can do that… what else is possible?”
“I’ve never been good at public speaking. Until I gave my first speech, and then my second, and then my twentieth. If I can do that… What else is possible?”
“I always give up on projects before I bring them to completion. Until I completed one project. Then another. Then another. If I can do that… What else is possible?“
If something I thought I could never do becomes possible, cracks start to appear in my limiting beliefs.
It’s not just about the habits. It’s about the belief that you can change your habits, trust in your ability to complete projects and stick to your routine.
And the only way to build that is through taking small daily actions that are votes for who you want to be (and what you want to achieve).
Again: it only takes one new daily action to start restoring your belief in the malleable mind.
Start with one. Then discover what else is possible.
