#260 Dancing circles around your gut

ByLukas
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You’ll write the book until you start doubting if you have it in you to write it… then realize that the only way to find out is by actually writing the book.

You’ll prepare for the marathon until you start doubting if you can finish it… then realize that the only way to find out is by actually running the marathon.

You’ll build the business until you start doubting if this is a viable idea… then realize that the only way to find out is by actually building the business.

No matter how much you dance circles, ignoring what your gut has been telling you, deep down, you know: this is where you should’ve gone all along.

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  • #470 Live the way you want, not the way you started

    ByLukas

    “Because that’s the way I always did it”. “Because that’s how I was raised.” “Because that’s just who I am.”

    “Because that’s the way I intend to do it.” “Because that’s how I believe I should act.” “Because that’s just who I choose to become.”

    Without bringing intention to your life, you won’t live the way you want but the way you started.

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    #15 Being intentional about the questions you ask yourself

    ByLukas

    What you focus on right now, in the present moment, strongly affects your state. Focus on problems, you start worrying. Focus on a pleasant prospect, you start dreaming.

    To manage state by directing focus, you must be intentional about the type of questions you ask to evaluate your experiences in life because whatever questions you ask yourself (and you DO ask yourself evaluating questions all the time, consciously or subconsciously), your brain is constantly coming up with answers for these questions.

    The answers can be accurate or not; that doesn’t matter to your brain. It’ll justify and find answers, reasons, and connections for anything you ask… and through those answers, give meaning to anything that happens to you (and interpret it as painful or pleasurable).

    How to be intentional about the questions you ask yourself:

    1. Eliminate limiting, “endless loop questions” that contain self-defeating presuppositions (like “Why does this always happen to me? Why am I always late? Why do I always give up? Why do I always hurt the people around me?). They’re dangerous because they force your mind to come up with answers: fake or real reasons that justify and perpetuate unhealthy behavior.
    2. Ask yourself empowering questions that challenge your mind to come up with empowering solutions, justifications, reasons:
      1. Empowering presuppositions: Why do I always arrive in time? Why do I always stick to the goals I set for myself? Why am I always kind to myself and others around me?
      2. Questions like “How can I be as helpful as possible? How can I make sure this is going to be a fulfilling, amazing day?”
      3. Questions like “What would the version of me I want to be do or say in this situation?”
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    #142 Overcalibration

    ByLukas

    Giving up on your intentions once doesn’t mean you’ll always give up.

    Quitting a workout routine or diet once doesn’t mean you’re doomed forever.

    Giving one clumsy speech doesn’t mean you’re a bad public speaker forever.

    Learning from the past is good. But predicting the future based on a small set of isolated past experiences is overcalibration.

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    #118 The Process is Predictable

    ByLukas

    First, you practice doing the process every day – because if you don’t do the process consistently, you’ll never move towards an outcome in the first place. Tiny Trust Builders always come first.

    Then, you practice becoming good at the process – because the better you are at the process, the more likely you’ll reach an outcome.

    But, unfortunately, even if you become excellent at the process, you still won’t be able to predict an exact outcome.

    Outcomes are fickle.

    Even progress is fickle.

    But the process is predictable.

    And who knows, maybe the process IS the outcome.

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