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  • #2 Why I write

    If writing and creating every day were as vital to my survival as drinking water, ingesting food, and bonding… What would life look like?

    Biologically, all behavior is driven by pain, pleasure, and the triggers and habits that come from repeated reaction to those stimuli.

    So I eat because I want to escape the pain of hunger – or heartbreak, sadness, and frustration.

    I connect with others because I’m neurologically hardwired to feel pleasure when bonding… and pain and deprivation when I’m abandoned.

    Similarly, I write because I want to escape the frustration of not being able to put into words an insight.

    I also write because I enjoy the rush resulting from finding the words that convey what I want to say.

    I write because I love the tingling in my back and neck when I combine those words into sentences with just the right rhythm, just the right cadence capturing the meaning, context, emotion of what I want to say…

    I write because writing wrests the essence from the whirlwind of thoughts and emotions racing through my mind and body.

    I write because when when I write, I feel that at last, I can make sense of life.

    And the more meaning I find, the more likely I am to write.

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    #286 You are not the words you write

    When you know you are not the words you write, you can write more freely.

    When you know you are not the time you run in your marathon, you can run more freely.

    When you know you are not your pain, you can let it be the without thinking it’ll never go away.

    And when you know you are not your love either, you can enjoy it fully without being afraid to lose it.

  • #281 How to know what to write and why

    To know what you’re going to write, you have to begin writing.

    Similarly, to know why you’re writing, you have to begin writing.

    The lure towards writing is what sets you in motion.

    And so it goes for drawing. Singing. Building. Entrepreneurship. Creating. Meeting friends. Lovers. Life partners.

    The act itself is what reveals both the purpose and the shape.

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    #11 fixing a flawed faux finish

    when the cracks in my faux finish
    finally appear
    my mind screams out
    you’re coming too near

    yet i resist the need to hide
    lean in to the fear
    let the cracks grow wide
    because after all these years
    slowly steadily submerged under layers of snow
    frozen frightened i don’t know where else to go

    i feel i’m sliding back into my head
    but you don’t let me
    instead
    you keep me here
    make even more light appear
    look at the fear
    until the icy flawed frozen faux finish finally fully melts away
    into a trembling torrent of tears

    and through the sobs
    subtle shining light teardrops
    mix mingle mend my mind
    my heart my soul a warmth so kind

    you guide my gaze and through the tears
    in my eyes a rainbow appears
    eclipsing the fear
    making it clear
    that when I dare to feel complete
    allow your heart and mine to meet

    i finally remember
    that I’m enough
    i’ve always been

    and at last
    i can be seen

    Lukas Van Vyve

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