Daily Insight

When the future doesn’t scare you anymore, and you say, “It’s okay.”

When daily worries don’t make you go astray anymore, and you say, “It’s okay.”

When you put it all into perspective, and you realize, “Hey, I am genuinely okay.”

You know more peaceful days are finally on their way.

First, you write. Then you become a writer.

First, you run. Then you become a runner.

First, you set boundaries. Then you become good at setting boundaries.

But before all that comes the decision to write. To run. To set boundaries.

Because you’re dissatisfied with the past and say never again.

Because you’re filled with excitement about a future vision.

Because you know you’re ready to make the change.

You’ll know when it’s time, my friend.

“Write 3 pages of Stream of Consciousness journaling.”

“Coming up with 100 things to be grateful about.”

“Publish a daily insight.”

My initial reaction, and maybe yours, is, “That’s so much.”

And that’s exactly the point.

It IS a lot.

But actually, it isn’t.

And when you try it out, and see that it isn’t, you’ve shattered the illusion of scarcity and discovered abundance.

Maybe we humans are wired to believe in scarcity and fighting over sparse food.

And while that may serve us well, in many endeavors, there’s much more abundance than we think.

If your gut reaction was, “That’s so much,” I invite you to try it out.

Write down what the voice in your head talks about for 3 entire pages.

Write down 100 things you’re grateful for.

Challenge the scarcity mindset.

There may well be abundance on the other side.

Am I running to get in better shape or to get distracting thoughts out of my head?

Am I going out to enjoy being with friends or to forget my worries?

Am I writing to grow an audience or to process my own emotions?

What am I striving for?

Your answers may vary from day to day. There are no right or wrong answers anyway.

But that doesn’t mean it isn’t useful to understand why you behave the way you do.

Maybe it even makes you curious about why others behave the way they do, too.

One question to make distractions fall away and make the mind turn quiet:

What’s most important right this very second?

Not today. Not this week. Right this very second.

Which conclusions did I draw from past experiences?

Have I overreacted to petty events, and ignored beautiful moments?

Have I deleted memories? Maybe invented some?

Have I built stories based on generalizations?

Most importantly: how does the past I still feel affect my actions today?

And if I know a lot of it was my own interpretation… could I change my past, or at least what it means to me?

Would that set me free?

I was undoubtedly in a pensive mood when writing this.

I guess, given the daily letters I send you, you might conclude I’m in a pensive mood every day.

And you wouldn’t be wrong.

But pensive moods can be useful – when they’re coupled with conclusions and insights. Maybe even with Tiny Trust Builders.

And if any of these questions help you re-interpret your past and set you free, too, I’ll be a happy man.

A wistful win-win.

“Is this really important right now?” I ask myself, as another distraction passes through my head.

I imagine an old wise man, disturbed from his task at hand, looking up.

“No? Can you come back later then, at a more appropriate time? Thank you very much.”

Back to work he goes.

“Is this really a life-threatening event?” I ask myself, as another anxiety-inducing thought intrudes my mind.

I imagine the same old wise man, fending off a harassing distraction.

“No? Can you come back with a message more appropriate to the severity of the event? Thank you very much.”

On with life he goes.

If only it were that easy, my friend.

The distracted, anxious, worried mind tends to fight back. I’m taking the liberty to assume you’ve also noticed that at some point in your life.

Nevertheless, I believe we can, nay, we must fight back.

Not that I’m advocating suppression.

Excited, worried, sanguine, anxious, passionate, defeated: let them have their moment of attention – at the appropriate time.

Maybe it’s all about the art of making all the selves get along?

I imagine the old wise man, who has mastered that art.

I know I’m not that old wise man yet.

But I could be, if I make it a point to practice every day.

And so could you, if you make it a point to practice every day.

If that’s something that’s important to you, of course. That’s for you to decide, in your personal situation and in your personal life.

When you decide if you should be chasing this goal, job, relationship, or place to live – in other words, commitment – you choose between action or inaction based on if it’s a viable, worthwhile, realistic goal.

When you decide on the course of action – in other words, how to do something – you’re already committed to action.

Sometimes, the commitment might be too big, too hard, or too disruptive – and that’s perfectly valid.

But here’s what I’ve noticed, my friend: whenever I try to decide on the how before I’ve decided on the commitment, I have even more doubts, and any course of action seems complicated.

I’m curious how you feel about it. We’ll talk more about it in the coming days and weeks.