Daily blog post number 70.
Sometimes I’m frustrated I get less “work” done than before I started publishing daily posts.
Until I remind myself: who do I want to be?
A writer. Who writes. And publishes his writing. Every single day.
Then I realize: it’s not just who I want to be anymore, but who I choose to be. Every single day.
This is my path.
Watching a sitcom or soap opera episode takes 20 minutes – and somehow, we always seem to find time for it.
Doing some stretches or a quick workout can take as little as 15 minutes – yet somehow, it’s very hard to find time for it.
Many good habits take take less time than watching a sitcom – and during and after, they’re often quite enjoyable. But our mind makes it so hard to start.
Whenever something that’s good for you feels insurmountable and your mind starts playing tricks on you, put it into perspective.
Doing this thing will take less time than watching a sitcom.
Maybe I could even do it while watching the sitcom.
And doing it will be a vote for the person I want to become.
Completion projects leads to restless rushing, an achievement, then a black hole. Indecision.
I got the promotion. I wrote the book. I finished the degree. I built the house. I sold the business. Now who am I… and what’s next?
Consistency projects lead to a change in habits and identity. Every day, I do what I believe to be true to who I am. As a result, every day, I’m becoming who I truly want to be.
Consistency projects are true life projects, because they’re about taking daily actions and installing habits, never-ending until they come to their natural conclusion.
I’ll write every day without ever thinking I’m writing my last words. Now I’m a writer… until one day, I feel: the season of writing is over.
You’ll tend to gardens, plants, and trees every day without ever thinking this is the last flower you’ll hold in your hand… until one day, you feel: the season of tree-tending is over.
We take care of our children from the moment they’re born, without thinking about letting them go. Now we’re caretakers… until one day, we feel: the season of caretaking is over.
We’ll breathe every day, without ever thinking about breathing our last breath. Now we’re breathers… until one day, we feel: the season of breathing is over.
Lukas Van Vyve
Plants are productive when they’re fertile: capable of producing fruit or offspring.
Plants are only prolific when they actually produce fruit in abundance.
https://wikidiff.com/prolific/productive
When it comes to creativity, we humans are all productive in the sense that we are capable of creating.
Productivity tools and “hacks” can help to create more space in your day for that creative potential.
But you’re only prolific when you use that creative potential and actually create something in abundance. Like Picasso.
Without prolificacy, productivity is just an empty container – unfulfilling, unfulfilled potential.
What can you be prolific in? What do you want to create in large quantities? What’s important enough to you to start sculpting away, day by day?
In all his life Picasso produced about 147,800 pieces, consisting of: 13,500 paintings, 100,000 prints and engravings, 300 sculptures and ceramics and 34,000 illustrations – an impressive 78-year career.
https://www.pablopicasso.org/picasso-facts.jsp
13,500 paintings; that’s almost 37 years of producing a painting, every single day.
How good would you be if you had painted daily for 37 years?
Maybe still not as good as Picasso. Or maybe better. Hard to tell, because while many people might be born with talent, few people have the discipline to combine it with that level of discipline.
Do you believe you’re good at something solely because of talent, invalidating all the work you’re putting in?
Or do you believe you can change the course of your life, and let your daily actions shape who you are?
The American psychologist and author of the book “Mindset” Carol Dweck describes how the way you think about your abilities can make or break your success in life:
When things get tough, people with an entity mindset often give up, because they don’t truly believe they can get much better.
After all,I if you believe it’s all about innate ability, then why make any effort to develop strengths or weaknesses?
An entity mindset also leads to fear of failure and perfectionism. If you’re believed to have an innate, fixed talent that’s set in stone, you’ll constantly need to live up to an unreasonably high standard for that particular talent.
People with an incremental mindset, on the other hand, thrive in tough situations: they know that through perseverance and a focus on daily practice and perseverance they can develop their skills and talents.
Even if predisposition plays an important role, switching to an incremental mindset will always make you feel better about yourself and your daily actions.
And while education and childhood experiences have a large impact on your mindset – you can always change your mind – by changing your actions.
Most of your daily actions are guided by unconscious patterns and habits. But since actions overrule thoughts, even unconscious actions contribute to how you see yourself.
The more conscious actions you take, the more of a say you get in who you are (or want to be).
I choose to do ………… because I choose to be someone who …………
I choose not to do ………… because I choose to perpetuate my identity of ………….
At any given time in your day, if you’re doing what you set out to do, whether it’s work, play, going for a walk, or taking a nap, you’re gaining traction. In other words, you’re taking action and are moving towards a goal you set… and you’re becoming more of the person you want to be.
If you’re not doing what you set out to do, you’re getting distracted. You’re taking action and are moving away from the goal you set… and you’re becoming less of the person you want to be.
Traction, distraction… it’s all action. The only difference: are your actions deliberate, and have you intentionally chosen who you want to be (and which actions align with that identity)?
I can consciously set out, in advance to write for two hours a day, because I want to be a writer. Then, if I end up actually writing during those two hours, I’m gaining traction towards that goal and the person I want to be: a writer.
I can also consciously set out, in advance, to watch a Netflix series afterward as a reward for my hard labor, because I want to be someone who also allows downtime and relaxation in my day.
And if during that time I set out to watch that series, I actually watch the series, guess what: I’m gaining traction towards that goal and identity too! (BUT following this logic, if during the time I set aside for Netflix, I decide to keep writing, strangely enough, the writing has now become the distraction. This is how you become a workaholic.)
If I set out to meet with friends, or have a romantic date night because I want to be someone who values friendships and relationships, and I follow through… yep, now I’m gaining traction in that domain too.
The same goes for anything else I consciously decide to do on any given day.
Choose for traction and let your actions be a vote for who you want to be.
I can write today, resent myself for not writing… or stop caring at all about writing.
I can publish a blog post today, resent myself for not posting, or stop caring at all about blog posts.
Taking action on something I care about is a valid choice.
Stopping to care about taking a certain action is an equally valid choice.
Resenting myself for not taking an action I care about… that’s a choice for self-torture.
In the series of self-sabotaging behavior I’ve observed in myself and others: “pre-emptively disqualifying yourself”.
Before you even start, you’re depriving yourself already of any potential benefit of the exercise because you don’t know if you’ll get the EXACT benefit promised/desired by you.
“This exercise might have cured your neck pain, but I’ve always had neck problems, it won’t chage anything.”
“You might be able to write every day, but for me, in my situation, that would never be possible.”
This shows a lack of understanding of learning principles. Because with any exercise, program, diet, methodology, you’ll never get the exact same results as someone else, because you can never replicate the exact circumstances and actions of a person.
Instead, you do the exercise/program/diet/… within the framework of your own personal context/skills/past experience. Within that context, it will guide your learning process. But the outcome resulting from it is personal.
Variance is to be expected, and this is a good thing. Because this is how innovation happens: actions in different types of circumstances lead to slightly different results. Sometime that leads to disappointment, sometimes to real breakthroughs.
Getting different results, then, is not a reason to pre-emptively disqualify yourself, or to claim something doesn’t work. Because the true value doesn’t lie in getting the exact same results as someone else, but rather, to consciously set the general direction of our lives.
Every day, we have to make so many decisions that lead us down different future paths, so modeling someone and using their actions as a guiding principle will greatly increase the probability of you going in the direction you desire, and getting results in the same ballpark.
For example, I’ve been doing Dylan Werner’s yoga classes on Alo Moves (my go-to online yoga/fitness/meditation app) consistently for almost two years now. Even if I continue to follow his exact schedule for two more years, chances are, I still might not be able to do something like this:
After all, we have a different body structure, different gene disposition, different circumstances, and I’ll have to adapt his schedule to my personal capacity.
Still, if I follow his schedule I’ll definitely become much stronger and healthier than if I chose to model a couch potato, watch TV and eat fries and burgers all day. And that’s what it’s all about.
Modeling, in that point of view, are an effective way to accelerate your progress and lead your life in the direction you want, without you having to know exactly which results you’ll get.
In other words: when you let go of the need to predict exact future outcomes, you can stop pre-emptively disqualifying yourself, and start pro-actively setting the direction of your life.
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