#331 Building habits the lazy way

ByLukas

Some people think they can’t build habits because they’re lazy.

Maybe we all are – so we might as well make laziness the key to building habits.

I write only one short daily post because I know I won’t stick to writing long-form posts – and when I feel like writing long-form, it doesn’t feel like an obligation but a treat. Laziness built the writing habit, and laziness makes me feel good when I write more.

I do 5-minute daily meditations because I know I won’t stick to 30-minute meditation as a habit – yet when I DO meditate for 30 minutes, it feels like a treat. Laziness built the meditation habit, and laziness makes me feel good when I meditate more.

If you are so sure you won’t stick to anything overly ambitious, what’s the laziest way you could implement a behavior change? Can you use that as your starting point to build life-changing habits?

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  • #20 I’ve never tried that before, so…

    ByLukas

    In the series of unlikely life advice: a quote ascribed to Astrid Lindgren’s legendary character Pippi Longstocking.

    I have never tried that before, so I think I should definitely be able to do that.

    https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/6773397-i-have-never-tried-that-before-so-i-think-i

    Only after reading this quote I realized how often we all hold the opposite belief: I have never tried that before, so I think I am not (and will never be) able to do that.

    What a sad and disempowering belief.

    Which begs the question…

    Where are you disqualifying yourself before even trying it out first?

    What would life be like if your default belief is that things you haven’t tried before are possible for you?

    How would that change your decisions?

    How much fear and frustration would you leave behind?

    Might be worth journaling about.

  • |

    #78 Unconscious categorization

    ByLukas

    Within a split second, I’ve categorized an object as an apple. Now I don’t pay attention to the dimensions, color, smell, and texture anymore.

    Within a split second, I’ve categorized an emotion as anger, fear, frustration, love. So I don’t pay attention to the physiological changes in my body anymore.

    I’m always categorizing – but I didn’t consciously create the categories.

    But what if I’m categorizing inaccurately?

    Can I interrupt instant categorization, governed by language, habits, patterns, past experience?

    Can I re-open my senses and see, smell, touch, hear, feel again?

    Can I start sensing nuances between the objects I behold?

    Can I discern nuances between the feelings I feel?

    Mindfulness, journaling, meditation, and learning languages can help with more conscious categorization.

    Because what if the anger I feel is nothing but fear?

    What if the fear I feel is nothing but frustration?

    What if the frustration I feel is nothing but unrequited love?

    And what if the love I feel is nothing but infatuation?

  • | |

    #158 Voting fraud doesn’t exist

    ByLukas

    Voting fraud doesn’t exist in your body and mind.

    You can’t cheat your way into being a writer. Your body and mind count every word as a vote for being a writer.

    You can’t cheat your way into being a runner. Your body and mind count every every stride as a vote for being a runner.

    You can’t cheat your way into being healthy. Your body and mind count every nutrient.

    Luckily, you don’t need a landslide to change your identity. A simple majority is enough to make the power balance tip over.

    Tiny Trust Builders.

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    #19 The first time feels funny, the fiftieth time you fly

    ByLukas

    In a podcast segment about practicing Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu,Tim Ferris and Joshua Waitzkin discuss a principle for managing expectations they call:

    “The first rep doesn’t count.”

    Tim Ferris, Josh Waitzkin: https://tim.blog/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/148-josh-waitzkin.pdf

    In other words: when performing a move for the first time, your body and mind need to get used to it. Gradually,you’ll get better – and the more aware you are of your body, the faster you’ll make progress – but judging someone on their first attempt doesn’t say much about their future potential.

    This holds true for many skills in life, like starting a daily publishing habit.

    Publishing a post or a video for the first time always feels funny (and often frightening). At this stage, judgment or feedback is futile. It’s all about jumping the hurdle of getting started

    Publish five times, you’re ready to get some feedback (both from yourself and from others)…

    Publish for the fiftieth time, and you’re well on your way to turn it into a habit… and fly.

    So whenever I start something new, I manage my expectations by repeating to myself:

    The first time feels funny. The fiftieth time I fly.

    And for bonus points: What would it feel like the 500th time?

  • |

    #21 Action Defies Excuses (day 20 update)

    ByLukas

    Day 20 of my daily publishing experiment. What I’ve learned (or remembered) so far:

    • Self-trust is built by taking action. On some days I woke up stressed out, thinking “I have no clue what I’ll post about today”. But then I start writing, and the post reveals itself on the page every single time. After experiencing that several times, the fear of posting (or not being able to write anything) is fading away. In other words: action defies excuses.
    • Starting to journal (Morning Pages) over 600 days ago led to an explosion in creativity. Starting to publish a daily insight is giving me a similar boost.
    • In the past, I leaned towards bigger, longer writing projects that required a lot of energy and thinking before I produced something “valuable”. I now see there’s power in consistently writing short posts about ideas and insights, no matter how insignificant and no matter how imperfect the writing. Because through the writing, I understand them better. I remember them better. And I’m confident that over time, from all these small insights, bigger ideas will emerge.

    In short, a pattern I’ve observed many time in the past years is playing out again:

    When I start defying my own excuses by taking action, no matter how small, my self-trust grows, my self-image shifts, and I become more of the person I want to be.

    Which begs the question:

    Where else am I frustrated, holding on to a static identity of the past that I could prove wrong by taking action?

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