When you start a new project, excitement eclipses sacrifices.
But when things get serious, you must know what you’re in for.
Your dreams may be worth every sacrifice. But you better know why, before life has passed you by.
Working on your business so hard you neglect your health – and end up in bed with a burnout.
Being so absorbed with selflessly helping others you forget to set boundaries – and end up drained and resentful.
Being so focused on the practice your neglect your friends and family – and you end up lonely.
The line between purposeful passion and compulsive addiction is thin.
This is where trust building comes in.
Building trust in your intentions – so you verify that your actions benefit you and your environment.
Building trust in your self-awareness – so you notice when you cross over in compulsive obsession space, and pull yourself back into purposeful passion territory.
Building trust in the people around you – so you listen to them when they see you’re slipping, and you let them help you get back on the right path.
Trust is a beacon of light, keeping you on track.
What will you do today to protect and fuel it?
Change happens when you let go of defective perspectives about who you were, are, and could be.
What you used to do, are doing, and could do.
What’s possible for you, and what’s not.
Whatever your current perspective, it’s defective. Or at least incomplete.
Life is beautifully unpredictable. You are beautifully unpredictable.
I don’t know about you, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.
When you lean in to the fear
The naysaying voices you hear
You’ll realize solutions are near
Within grasp
Maybe already here
And so is everything else you hold dear.
You don’t need to find the motivation to start doing the work.
It’s more likely you need to start doing the work to find motivation.
And if it truly feels impossible to do the work, maybe you just need some rest.
Do you believe you’re good at something solely because of talent, invalidating all the work you’re putting in?
Or do you believe you can change the course of your life, and let your daily actions shape who you are?
The American psychologist and author of the book “Mindset” Carol Dweck describes how the way you think about your abilities can make or break your success in life:
When things get tough, people with an entity mindset often give up, because they don’t truly believe they can get much better.
After all,I if you believe it’s all about innate ability, then why make any effort to develop strengths or weaknesses?
An entity mindset also leads to fear of failure and perfectionism. If you’re believed to have an innate, fixed talent that’s set in stone, you’ll constantly need to live up to an unreasonably high standard for that particular talent.
People with an incremental mindset, on the other hand, thrive in tough situations: they know that through perseverance and a focus on daily practice and perseverance they can develop their skills and talents.
Even if predisposition plays an important role, switching to an incremental mindset will always make you feel better about yourself and your daily actions.
And while education and childhood experiences have a large impact on your mindset – you can always change your mind – by changing your actions.
The most important habit milestone is the center of gravity shift.
Initially, when you start building a new skill, your center of gravity lies with your old identity. You’re constantly fighting the pull of your old identity. And if you’d stop for even a day, you’ll get pulled right back into your old habits.
“If I don’t write today, what does that say about me? I’ve always given up in the past, and with this habit, it’ll be the same.”
The center of gravity shift happens when you’re about to miss a day and realize:
“It doesn’t matter, tomorrow I’ll start again anyway.”
When you’ve cast so many votes for your “identity of perseverance” you know that missing one day doesn’t equal giving up anymore.
When not writing for a day has become the exception, and when it happens, I get pulled right back into my writing habit.
Before the shift happens, when you’re still building self-trust, discipline is key.
But after your center of gravity has shifted to align with what you want to do anyway… you’re free.
