Almost broke the chain today.
Then I remembered:
“We must all suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. The difference is discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons.”
Jim Rohn
Nothing builds more trust than daily practice, back to back.
Today, remembering that is more than enough.
I’m back on track.
You can’t change the fact that winning makes you a winner and losing makes you a loser.
But you CAN:
What if, instead of only winning when you beat your opponent, to you, winning means giving it your all and putting your heart on the line?
What if, to you, winning doesn’t mean writing a bestselling book (which is out of your control anyway) but showing the discipline to write a book in the first place… a book that potentially could be a bestseller?
What if, to you, losing doesn’t mean suffering a defeat but giving in to your fear and never starting in the first place?
Make your own rules around winning and losing, and don’t make them too hard on yourself. It’s a simple and viable way to feel better every day.
Writing every day won’t always help you achieve your greatest desires.
But it might help you lose them — when you realize that what you really wanted was not the outcome, but the feeling of consciously choosing who you want to be, and consciously acting in alignment with that choice.
Once the desires have fallen away, all that remains is the fulfillment every day.
You can relax now.
Does it make you feel good right now?
Will you feel good about it in an hour?
Will you feel good about it in a year?
I don’t know why I decide to write every day.
But I know writing feels right.
I know it feels like what the person I want to be would do.
Sometimes, that explanation is not enough.
But usually that’s all the “why” I need to write again.
The other day, I talked about changing your focus to change how you feel about the events in your day.
But something strange happened when I first had that realization.
It didn’t feel like a relief.
Do I even want that responsibility? To choose how events affect me?
After all, that would take away my right to complain about how poorly life treats me.
I couldn’t ascribe any successes or achievements to “sheer luck” anymore.
And wouldn’t it be silly to say I don’t deserve happiness, luck, or anything good if I knew I could change my focus and be lucky this very moment?
What a burden.
I’m still deciding if I am strong enough to carry it.
But one thing’s for sure: the days I have the presence of mind to direct my focus are the days I feel best.
I wonder if it’d be like that for you, too.
Maybe you could try it out? Even if it’s to indulge me.
See how it feels.
And let me know how it goes. I’m curious about you.
With how (online) education and teaching are done nowadays, most people give up long before they get real results. Let’s fix that with this counterintuitive 3-step approach to skill-building: 👇
1️⃣ Step 1: Intent Builder.
Before you start, you must light a fire under yourself.
Why is this important to you?
What do you stand to gain?
Also (especially), what do you stand to lose?
(❗️I guarantee that at some point, you’ll forget what you’re doing it all for. So make your Intent strong and remind yourself every day; otherwise, you’ll always let life get in the way.)
2️⃣ Step 2: Trust Builder.
In the first 14-21 days, there’s only one thing that matters:
Can you prove to yourself that your Intent is strong enough to show up and take action daily?
Or are you derailed by the slightest setback or the lack of quick results?
Most people don’t have that trust in themselves yet. So you must build it up by taking small, daily actions completely decoupled from “quick wins” (I call them Tiny Trust Builders).
This is counterintuitive because people crave instant results, which means most course creators try to build them in their programs.
But the harsh truth is, only when you can show up without getting instant results are you ready to get real results.
3️⃣ Step 3: Skill Builder.
Once you’ve built the trust that you’ll show up, you can focus on skills, progress, and results. Here are two valuable mechanisms that take you from Trust-Building to Skill-Building:
👉 Make things a little harder every day or week
👉 Implement feedback loops: ask for coach feedback, talk about what you’re doing, show your work,…
Bottom line:
Learning something new is easier if you’re already in the habit of showing up every day.
It’s also easier to get through a bad day if you’re already in the habit of showing up every day – after all, you know that tomorrow, you’ll be there to take action again.
