#56 Action, traction, distraction

ByLukas
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At any given time in your day, if you’re doing what you set out to do, whether it’s work, play, going for a walk, or taking a nap, you’re gaining traction. In other words, you’re taking action and are moving towards a goal you set… and you’re becoming more of the person you want to be.

If you’re not doing what you set out to do, you’re getting distracted. You’re taking action and are moving away from the goal you set… and you’re becoming less of the person you want to be.

Traction, distraction… it’s all action. The only difference: are your actions deliberate, and have you intentionally chosen who you want to be (and which actions align with that identity)?

I can consciously set out, in advance to write for two hours a day, because I want to be a writer. Then, if I end up actually writing during those two hours, I’m gaining traction towards that goal and the person I want to be: a writer.

I can also consciously set out, in advance, to watch a Netflix series afterward as a reward for my hard labor, because I want to be someone who also allows downtime and relaxation in my day.

And if during that time I set out to watch that series, I actually watch the series, guess what: I’m gaining traction towards that goal and identity too! (BUT following this logic, if during the time I set aside for Netflix, I decide to keep writing, strangely enough, the writing has now become the distraction. This is how you become a workaholic.)

If I set out to meet with friends, or have a romantic date night because I want to be someone who values friendships and relationships, and I follow through… yep, now I’m gaining traction in that domain too.

The same goes for anything else I consciously decide to do on any given day.

Choose for traction and let your actions be a vote for who you want to be.

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    #265 Dance the barbell balance of life

    ByLukas

    Living a balanced life doesn’t mean living average experiences.

    It’s more like a barbell, or a seesaw, where you go all in on complementary actions.

    Work hard, rest hard.

    Write with total focus, then fully let go when you’ve hit your word target.

    Work out with full intensity, then let your body fully recover.

    So when you’re out of balance, the solution is not to come closer to the middle.

    Instead, you start doing less of what you’re already doing or add more of the polar opposite of what you’re already doing.

    Figure out your polar opposite pairs, and give them both the attention they deserve. That’s how you dance the barbell balance of life.

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    #71 Muffled feet

    ByLukas

    The ankle and foot complex contains 26 bones, 33 joints and over 100 muscles, tendons and ligaments.

    Considering both feet, that makes a total of 52 bones, making up about a quarter of all bones found in the mature adult body.

    https://3d4medical.com/blog/facts-about-feet

    There are more nerve endings per square centimetre in the foot than any other part of the body.

    https://www.simardfootclinic.com/feet-facts

    A wealth of sensory information – suppressed by the padding in our shoes, orthotics – until we don’t sense anything anymore.

    It’s like wearing safety ear muffs all day.

    What was walking on this earth like, before we learned not to listen?

    Muffled feet.

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    #24 Put your actions where your mouth is

    ByLukas

    Here’s a useful insight from James Clear, author of Atomic Habits:

    Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.

    https://jamesclear.com/3-2-1/june-4-2020

    Writing every day reaffirms my “I’m a writer” identity.

    Sitting on the couch every day reaffirms my “I’m a couch potato” identity.

    As a consequence: when you change your actions and your identity starts shifting to align with those actions.

    And that’s how we get out of a rut.

    (The opposite isn’t always true: changing your thoughts without changing your actions will rarely shift your identity. I can think of being a writer as much as I want, if I never put any words on paper, I’m not a writer. That’s one of the principle of cognitive dissonance: Actions overrule Thoughts.)

    Here’s how to change your actions and your identity:

    1. First, you decide who you want to be (and what your new identity looks like).
      “I want to be a yogi: someone who regularly practices yoga and takes care of his mind and body.”
    2. Second you get clear on what that would look like in your daily life: which actions you’ll take that are different from the ones you’re taking right now.
      “Instead of watching TV before, my “yogi identity” would do a daily yoga session.
    3. Third, you gain enough leverage over yourself to go against your current habits, and take those different action for a prolonged period of time.
      This is where most resistance comes up, because my old “couch potato identity” is fighting my “yogi” identity — and through my past actions, the couch potato has received WAY more votes than the yogi.
      So you need perseverance at this stage. Remember, every time you take those new actions, you’re voting for your new identity and new habits are taking roots.
    4. At some point, you reach a tipping point productivity experts call “habit escape velocity“: you now have so much momentum that you’re out of the sphere of influence of your old habits, and your new habits (and new identity) can take root.

    Which begs the question…

    Where are you saying you want to be a certain way, but you’re voting for something else through your daily actions?

    Lukas Van Vyve

    Put your money (or your actions) where your mouth is.

  • #484 Comfortable in uncomfortable misconceptions

    ByLukas

    Even when the cure is available, we never let our body heal, because what would we do if we couldn’t complain about our ailments anymore?

    Even when true love presents itself, we push it away, because what would we do if we can’t complain about partners leaving us anymore?

    Even when friends and family show support, we don’t allow it, because what would we do if we can’t say anymore that everyone is out to screw us over?

    Would we rather stay stubborn? Would we rather stay comfortable in our uncomfortable misconceptions?

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    #172 The pursuit of failure

    ByLukas

    I can’t just say, “today, I’m going to be excellent at writing.”

    Excellence is an outcome: a result of focused daily actions.

    And one of the fastest ways to excellence is the pursuit of failure.

    Not just making accidental mistakes but actively seeking them out.

    Did I write nonsense today? Did I understand why I was writing nonsense? Have I learned something from writing that nonsense that will help me write something less nonsensical tomorrow?

    The pursuit of failure is painful, especially for perfectionists like me.

    But once ego, perfectionism, and the fear of failure make way for a commitment to the process, there’s much to learn from daily mistakes.

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