#100 There are by-products. And then there’s what matters.

ByLukas
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The moment you stop doing things for what they can give you, and start doing things for who you become through doing them, is the moment you get everything you ever wanted.

Lukas Van Vyve

I don’t write a blog post every day just to have a pile of posts on the blog.

I write because writing is what makes me a writer. And I enjoy being a writer very much.

The blog posts are but a byproduct. Pleasant. But a byproduct.

I don’t practice Stream Of Consciousness journaling every day to write beautiful prose, poems or have amazing insights.

I do it because it calms the mind. Because my life is better with it than without.

And because doing something for 700 days straight shows me that I, too, am becoming a disciplined person. And I enjoy being a disciplined person very much.

The occasional insights are but a byproduct. Pleasant. But a byproduct.

I don’t practice the guitar so I can show the world how well I play.

I play because it’s fun to practice something hard and feel a sense of improvement.

And because practicing the guitar makes me a musician. And I enjoy being a musician very much.

Being able to play a beautiful piece is just a by-product. Pleasant. But a byproduct.

There are by-products. And then there’s what matters.

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    #62 Productive vs prolific

    ByLukas

    Plants are productive when they’re fertile: capable of producing fruit or offspring.

    Plants are only prolific when they actually produce fruit in abundance.

    https://wikidiff.com/prolific/productive

    When it comes to creativity, we humans are all productive in the sense that we are capable of creating.

    Productivity tools and “hacks” can help to create more space in your day for that creative potential.

    But you’re only prolific when you use that creative potential and actually create something in abundance. Like Picasso.

    Without prolificacy, productivity is just an empty container – unfulfilling, unfulfilled potential.

    What can you be prolific in? What do you want to create in large quantities? What’s important enough to you to start sculpting away, day by day?

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    #29 The myth of self-sabotage

    ByLukas

    All behavior is inspired by avoiding pain or gaining pleasure – and since you usually act on what your brain perceives as the most intense of the two.

    So if you think you desire something, but then “sabotage” yourself so you never get what you desire, that means you have mixed feelings about desire (and thus inner conflict): deep down, you feel that desire will give you more pain than pleasure.

    In other words, it’s not self-sabotage: it’s your brain protecting you from pain it perceives as stronger than the pleasure you might get from reaching your goal.

    Maybe you desire more money, but deep down, you feel money will corrupt you, or make you lose friends, make you feel guilty, or make you lose your drive.

    Maybe you have a desire to write or create, but you feel the pain of judgment or rejection is stronger than the pleasure of creating.

    Maybe you want to get in shape, but deep down, you feel you’ll give up anyway before reaching any meaningful results, so you’d rather save yourself the pain of future disappointment (a classic self-trust problem).

    Maybe you notice a certain destructive pattern in your relationships, but you believe going to therapy and “opening up that can of worms” will be even worse than perpetuating the current situation.

    If you keep sabotaging yourself, it might be worth to ask yourself the question: what pain am I avoiding? What am I afraid of? In my imagination, what’s going to happen when I reach my goal; both positive AND negative?

    Or even better than just asking: journal about it.

  • #340 This is all you have to do today

    ByLukas

    You may want to be a published, acclaimed author, or an online writer with a massive audience. But today, all you have to do is write.

    You may want to be the best marathon runner in your country. But today, all you have to do is go for one run.

    Whatever lofty vision you have for yourself, today, all you have to do is take one tiny step, one Tiny Trust Builder moving you closer to the person you want to be.

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    #159 What unintentional living looks like

    ByLukas

    Unintentional living and identity building look like this:

    1. Actions are inspired by pain and pleasure.
    2. Repeated pain and pleasure lead to repeated actions.
    3. Repeated actions lead to habits.
    4. Habits shape your identity.

    “Life made me who I am, and I can’t do anything about it.”

    Intentional living and identity building look like this:

    1. Who do I want to be? What’s my desired identity?
    2. Which habits that would turn me into that person do I not have in place right now?
    3. Which repeated actions that would build that habit am I not currently taking?
    4. Which reactions to pain and pleasure triggers in my life can I change? Which pain and pleasure triggers can I ban out of my life completely?

    “While the past has shaped me, the way I choose to live my life today, tomorrow, and every day after, will determine who I am.”

    You’re living anyway. Your actions are votes for an identity anyway. So you might as well do it intentionally.

  • #315 You don’t have a shot at getting results yet

    ByLukas

    Most habits are hard to stick to because they promise not only a positive lifestyle change but also instant results.

    But worrying about building a habit and getting results at the same time leads to frustration and, ultimately, failure – after all, when building a habit, showing up every day is already hard enough.

    First, you must learn to trust that you can show up every day, even if you don’t see improvement right away.

    Only then do you get a shot at getting results.

    The key is in the power of tiny actions, consistently taken.

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