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    #139 Habit Milestones

    The most important habit milestone is the center of gravity shift.

    Initially, when you start building a new skill, your center of gravity lies with your old identity. You’re constantly fighting the pull of your old identity. And if you’d stop for even a day, you’ll get pulled right back into your old habits.

    “If I don’t write today, what does that say about me? I’ve always given up in the past, and with this habit, it’ll be the same.”

    The center of gravity shift happens when you’re about to miss a day and realize:

    “It doesn’t matter, tomorrow I’ll start again anyway.”

    When you’ve cast so many votes for your “identity of perseverance” you know that missing one day doesn’t equal giving up anymore.

    When not writing for a day has become the exception, and when it happens, I get pulled right back into my writing habit.

    Before the shift happens, when you’re still building self-trust, discipline is key.

    But after your center of gravity has shifted to align with what you want to do anyway… you’re free.

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    #63 Completion vs Consistency: True Life Projects

    Completion projects leads to restless rushing, an achievement, then a black hole. Indecision.

    I got the promotion. I wrote the book. I finished the degree. I built the house. I sold the business. Now who am I… and what’s next?

    Consistency projects lead to a change in habits and identity. Every day, I do what I believe to be true to who I am. As a result, every day, I’m becoming who I truly want to be.

    Consistency projects are true life projects, because they’re about taking daily actions and installing habits, never-ending until they come to their natural conclusion.

    I’ll write every day without ever thinking I’m writing my last words. Now I’m a writer… until one day, I feel: the season of writing is over.

    You’ll tend to gardens, plants, and trees every day without ever thinking this is the last flower you’ll hold in your hand… until one day, you feel: the season of tree-tending is over.

    We take care of our children from the moment they’re born, without thinking about letting them go. Now we’re caretakers… until one day, we feel: the season of caretaking is over.

    We’ll breathe every day, without ever thinking about breathing our last breath. Now we’re breathers… until one day, we feel: the season of breathing is over.

    Lukas Van Vyve
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    #103 Show me one daily action

    So you say you want to be a writer?
    Show me one daily action that proves that’s true.

    So you say you value connection with family and friends?
    Show me one daily action that demonstrates you do.

    So you say you want to learn a foreign language?
    Show me one daily action. Show me you’ll follow through.

    Show me one daily action. Not for me. But for you.

    For you to start believing you care.

    That your dreams and desires aren’t just castles in the air.

    That you dare to build an identity that supports your values and aspirations.

    Because actions overrule thoughts.

    Actions form (or break) beliefs.

    Actions aligned with your values build trust in your good intentions, and change your identity.

    One action a day. That’s all it takes.

    Lukas Van Vyve
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    #134 Losing makes you a loser – and that’s fine

    You can’t change the fact that winning makes you a winner and losing makes you a loser.

    But you CAN:

    • stop caring about winning and losing in the first place; or
    • change your definition of winning and losing so winning becomes easier, and losing harder.

    What if, instead of only winning when you beat your opponent, to you, winning means giving it your all and putting your heart on the line?

    What if, to you, winning doesn’t mean writing a bestselling book (which is out of your control anyway) but showing the discipline to write a book in the first place… a book that potentially could be a bestseller?

    What if, to you, losing doesn’t mean suffering a defeat but giving in to your fear and never starting in the first place?

    Make your own rules around winning and losing, and don’t make them too hard on yourself. It’s a simple and viable way to feel better every day.

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    #120 A lifetime of practice ahead of you

    If you knew you’d write more words tomorrow anyway…

    If you knew you’d put your body in a yoga pose every day…

    If you knew you’d write the same song over and over again either way…

    If you knew there’d be no pressure to nail the guitar piece because tomorrow there’s another chance to play…

    If you knew you’d have a lifetime of practice ahead of you – what would you focus on today?

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    #66 Scarcity is like pollution

    Some days I have ten ideas to write about. Some days, zero.

    But when I lack ideas to write about, the ideas aren’t really gone. I’m in a scarcity state: my brain chemistry prevents me from accessing the insights.

    When I feel lonely, friends and family I can connect with aren’t really gone. I’m in a scarcity state: my brain chemistry prevents me from connecting with them.

    Scarcity is like pollution.

    When noise pollution of cars, planes and construction machines drown out the singing of the birds, the birds aren’t really gone. I just can’t hear them.

    When light pollution drowns out the stars, they’re not really gone. I just can’t see them.

    So how do I get out of scarcity? How do I reduce pollution?

    Here’s what works for me:

    Notice I’m in scarcity mode. Then move. Meditate. Do stream-of-consciousness journaling.

    Then find a place where I hear the birds.
    Find a place where I can see the stars.
    Write anyway.
    And connect with friends and family anyway.

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