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    #15 Being intentional about the questions you ask yourself

    What you focus on right now, in the present moment, strongly affects your state. Focus on problems, you start worrying. Focus on a pleasant prospect, you start dreaming.

    To manage state by directing focus, you must be intentional about the type of questions you ask to evaluate your experiences in life because whatever questions you ask yourself (and you DO ask yourself evaluating questions all the time, consciously or subconsciously), your brain is constantly coming up with answers for these questions.

    The answers can be accurate or not; that doesn’t matter to your brain. It’ll justify and find answers, reasons, and connections for anything you ask… and through those answers, give meaning to anything that happens to you (and interpret it as painful or pleasurable).

    How to be intentional about the questions you ask yourself:

    1. Eliminate limiting, “endless loop questions” that contain self-defeating presuppositions (like “Why does this always happen to me? Why am I always late? Why do I always give up? Why do I always hurt the people around me?). They’re dangerous because they force your mind to come up with answers: fake or real reasons that justify and perpetuate unhealthy behavior.
    2. Ask yourself empowering questions that challenge your mind to come up with empowering solutions, justifications, reasons:
      1. Empowering presuppositions: Why do I always arrive in time? Why do I always stick to the goals I set for myself? Why am I always kind to myself and others around me?
      2. Questions like “How can I be as helpful as possible? How can I make sure this is going to be a fulfilling, amazing day?”
      3. Questions like “What would the version of me I want to be do or say in this situation?”
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    #129 When the going gets tough

    When I’m inspired, I write.

    When I’m over the moon, I write.

    When I’m frustrated, I write.

    When I’m sad, I write.

    When I’m angry, I write.

    When I’m so overwhelmed I don’t want to do anything at all, I write.

    Because when the tides of life get rough, a consistent practice is your life raft.


    Writing, running, yoga, music, walking, gardening, knitting, dancing, singing, surfing…

    You not only build trust in such habits and practices to achieve lofty goals but also – even more so – to fall back on when the going gets tough, and you need a beacon of stability to keep you afloat.

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    #132 Unlimited Learning

    Learning often implies discovering what you can’t do.

    I can’t write and convey what I want to say. I can’t speak Spanish fluently. I can’t do this yoga pose.

    For many people that’s also the final destination, when in fact, it’s only the start.

    We’re missing a word: Learning is discovering what you can’t do yet.

    Or, even better:

    Learning is discovering what, through diligent practice, you’ll soon be able to do.

    After all, actions overrule thoughts.

    I can’t write and find the right words… yet. But with diligent practice, soon, I’ll be able to convey what I want to say.

    I’m not able to do this yoga pose… yet. But with diligent practice, soon I will.

    I can’t speak Spanish fluently… yet. But with diligent practice, soon I will.

    That’s all there is to it.

    Discover your current limit. Realize that through diligent practice, you’ll overcome it.

    Then you’ll find a new limit. And through diligent practice, you’ll overcome it.

    Until you find a new limit, which you’ll overcome… through diligent practice.

    Where do you let the discovery of your current limit be your end station?

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