#22 Actions Overrule Thoughts

ByLukas
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One of the most potent drivers of change AND perpetuators of old habits is cognitive dissonance:

In the field of psychology, cognitive dissonance is the perception of contradictory information, and the mental toll of it. Relevant items of information include a person’s actions, feelings, ideas, beliefs, values, and things in the environment. Cognitive dissonance is typically experienced as psychological stress when persons participate in an action that goes against one or more of those things.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_dissonance

What’s interesting about cognitive dissonance is that both “sides” of the dissonance are not equal:

If you think one thing, but you do something else, eventually you’ll start believing what you do, not what you think.

In other words: actions overrule thoughts.

  1. If I tell myself I can’t write a daily post (thought) and I don’t write a daily post (action), I perpetuate the belief.
  2. If I tell myself I can’t write a daily post (thought) but I gain enough courage and I actually do write a daily post (action), I will start shifting my belief towards the actions I’m taking. In other words: I’ll start believing I can write a daily post.
  3. If I tell myself I can write a daily post (thought), but I never actually write that daily post (action), then my belief will start shifting again, and I’ll start believing I can’t write a daily post.
  4. If I tell myself I can write a daily post (thought) and I do write a daily post (action), my belief grows stronger.

We usually start in the first scenario until we gain enough leverage over ourselves to change our actions. The moment we change our actions to actions that conflict with our thoughts/beliefs, we’re creating cognitive dissonance.

Then, if we follow through with our new actions, our beliefs start to change.

The big turning point is that moment where you start taking a different action.

Which begs the question:

  • How can we gain enough leverage over ourselves to go against our beliefs and change our actions for the better?
  • How can we make it so important to us to change (or so painful NOT to change) that we start taking different actions?

Identify your leverage points that jolt you into action, and you gain power over your beliefs and identity.

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    #63 Completion vs Consistency: True Life Projects

    ByLukas

    Completion projects leads to restless rushing, an achievement, then a black hole. Indecision.

    I got the promotion. I wrote the book. I finished the degree. I built the house. I sold the business. Now who am I… and what’s next?

    Consistency projects lead to a change in habits and identity. Every day, I do what I believe to be true to who I am. As a result, every day, I’m becoming who I truly want to be.

    Consistency projects are true life projects, because they’re about taking daily actions and installing habits, never-ending until they come to their natural conclusion.

    I’ll write every day without ever thinking I’m writing my last words. Now I’m a writer… until one day, I feel: the season of writing is over.

    You’ll tend to gardens, plants, and trees every day without ever thinking this is the last flower you’ll hold in your hand… until one day, you feel: the season of tree-tending is over.

    We take care of our children from the moment they’re born, without thinking about letting them go. Now we’re caretakers… until one day, we feel: the season of caretaking is over.

    We’ll breathe every day, without ever thinking about breathing our last breath. Now we’re breathers… until one day, we feel: the season of breathing is over.

    Lukas Van Vyve
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    #41 Unaligned agendas

    ByLukas

    Benefit and harm all depend on your perspective. The futurist John Smart suggests looking at phenomena, trends, and events through four different lenses (the “Foresight Tetrad“):

    • Personal
    • Organizational (=collective)
    • Global
    • Universal

    Every level has its own agenda, but their interests are rarely fully aligned.

    For example: for evolution and natural selection to work, a life form must have a reasonably short lifespan, reproduce quickly, and most importantly, not clone their DNA perfectly. Because small genetic reproduction errors help a species evolve and become better adapted to our environment.

    Sn an organizational/collective level (taking all of humanity together) those genetic errors are a good thing. In fact, without them, human beings in our current brain, with our current intelligence, wouldn’t even exist. Not at a species level, and not at an individual level.

    But to stumble upon a couple of beneficial “genetic errors”, evolution also needs tons of harmful genetic errors.

    That means that every newborn runs the risk of genetic errors that can cause medical conditions, pain, and suffering – on an individual level.

    We suffer individually to evolve collectively.

    Another example: in our quest to improve the condition of humanity as a whole (at the organizational/collective level), we’re harming other species and change the climate (at a global level).

    Ignoring the principles the universe and the earth as an ecosystem might well lead to collapse of that ecosystem – and result in the collapse of humanity.

    The universe has an agenda.
    Natural selection has an agenda.
    The global earth has an agenda.
    Humanity as a whole has an agenda.
    Individuals have an agenda.

    We can’t afford to ignore any.

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    #129 When the going gets tough

    ByLukas

    When I’m inspired, I write.

    When I’m over the moon, I write.

    When I’m frustrated, I write.

    When I’m sad, I write.

    When I’m angry, I write.

    When I’m so overwhelmed I don’t want to do anything at all, I write.

    Because when the tides of life get rough, a consistent practice is your life raft.

    Writing, running, yoga, music, walking, gardening, knitting, dancing, singing, surfing…

    You not only build trust in such habits and practices to achieve lofty goals but also – even more so – to fall back on when the going gets tough, and you need a beacon of stability to keep you afloat.

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    #282 You can write every day

    ByLukas

    If you truly believe you can write every day – not that it is generally possible to write every day, but that YOU can write every day – you would be doing it already.

    So if you’re not, ask yourself:

    Do you believe YOU can write every day?

    If not, why not?

    Is it physically impossible for you to write something every day? A page, a paragraph, a sentence… a word?

    Deep down, you know the answer to that question.

    And now we’ve established you can write every day; what other excuses come up?

    That the work won’t be good?

    That the words won’t capture what you want to say?

    That you’ll disappoint others?

    That you’ll disappoint yourself?

    Put words to your fears, then ask yourself: what would happen if they all came true?

    Would that stop you from writing? Or would it liberate you?

    Would you maybe be just fine?

    What would it be like to have overcome your fears and still be writing anyway?

    Only one way to find out…

    Write. Every. Day.

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    #286 You are not the words you write

    ByLukas

    When you know you are not the words you write, you can write more freely.

    When you know you are not the time you run in your marathon, you can run more freely.

    When you know you are not your pain, you can let it be the without thinking it’ll never go away.

    And when you know you are not your love either, you can enjoy it fully without being afraid to lose it.

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