#546 The easiest path to where you want to go

ByLukas

The easiest path is to miss all days – you never get going in the first place so you don’t know what you’re missing.

The second easiest is to never miss a day – you’ll get where you want to go with little detours, even if you pay the cost of discipline.

The hardest (and most common) path is to miss a couple of days here and there – now you run the risk of getting lost.

We all miss a day sometimes – so we all get a little lost once in a while.

So what do we do?

We remind ourselves why we got started.

We remind ourselves where we’re going.

We remind ourselves that we’ve been lost before – and that we can always get back on track.

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    #218 The United States of “If I wanted, I could”

    ByLukas

    The path toward self-awareness isn’t always pleasant. 

    Take yesterday, when I realized that in many cases, I’m more interested in the comfort of “wanting” something I don’t have than in “taking action to get something.”

    That unappealing realization triggered a cascade of even more unappealing questions.

    Would I rather mess around with small blog posts instead of becoming a skilled writer crafting coherent arguments?

    Would I rather learn about a million different strategies to grow a newsletter instead of actually spreading the word and getting more people to read my newsletter?

    Would I rather learn how to learn a language than actually learn a new language?

    Is the frustration of unrealized potential also a huge source of comfort in my life?

    I’m not sure if I should be happy with that realization. 

    Maybe realizations aren’t even supposed to make me happy.

    But even if they were, it doesn’t matter. 

    Because look: here I am, writing another insight about it.

    Another Tiny Trust Builder, proving that every day, I am one step closer to renouncing my citizenship of the United States of “If I wanted, I could.”

    Another reminder to myself and you, my friend, one I’ll repeat until the bitter end: actions overrule thoughts.

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    #90 Envision, want, choose

    ByLukas

    First I envision a future me. Who do I want to be?

    Then every single day, every single moment, I choose to take actions that turn me into that person I want to be.

    If I don’t consciously choose my actions in the present moment that contribute to my vision, and I’m led by old unconscious patterns, beliefs, and habits instead, my visions will remain imaginary.

    And if I never take the time to envision who I want to be, how do I know which actions to choose?

    First envision what you want. Then choose to make it happen.

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    #63 Completion vs Consistency: True Life Projects

    ByLukas

    Completion projects leads to restless rushing, an achievement, then a black hole. Indecision.

    I got the promotion. I wrote the book. I finished the degree. I built the house. I sold the business. Now who am I… and what’s next?

    Consistency projects lead to a change in habits and identity. Every day, I do what I believe to be true to who I am. As a result, every day, I’m becoming who I truly want to be.

    Consistency projects are true life projects, because they’re about taking daily actions and installing habits, never-ending until they come to their natural conclusion.

    I’ll write every day without ever thinking I’m writing my last words. Now I’m a writer… until one day, I feel: the season of writing is over.

    You’ll tend to gardens, plants, and trees every day without ever thinking this is the last flower you’ll hold in your hand… until one day, you feel: the season of tree-tending is over.

    We take care of our children from the moment they’re born, without thinking about letting them go. Now we’re caretakers… until one day, we feel: the season of caretaking is over.

    We’ll breathe every day, without ever thinking about breathing our last breath. Now we’re breathers… until one day, we feel: the season of breathing is over.

    Lukas Van Vyve

  • #224 What a burden

    ByLukas

    The other day, I talked about changing your focus to change how you feel about the events in your day.

    But something strange happened when I first had that realization.

    It didn’t feel like a relief.

    Do I even want that responsibility? To choose how events affect me?

    After all, that would take away my right to complain about how poorly life treats me.
    I couldn’t ascribe any successes or achievements to “sheer luck” anymore.
    And wouldn’t it be silly to say I don’t deserve happiness, luck, or anything good if I knew I could change my focus and be lucky this very moment?

    What a burden.

    I’m still deciding if I am strong enough to carry it.

    But one thing’s for sure: the days I have the presence of mind to direct my focus are the days I feel best.

    I wonder if it’d be like that for you, too.

    Maybe you could try it out? Even if it’s to indulge me.

    See how it feels.

    And let me know how it goes. I’m curious about you.

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